Episode 1: Dr. Mort Orman

September 05, 2024

Dr. Mort Orman

Dr. Mort Orman is a physician, an award-winning author and is America’s leading stress elimination expert. Dr. Orman is currently focused on helping Business Owners to eliminate most of their stress, so they can be happier, healthier and even more successful. So if you are a business owner and you would like Dr. Orman to personally work with you or your business, just go to the “Contact” tab above and send him a message.

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Episode Transcript

Transcript:

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Mark Entrekin: Alright. We are now recording welcome. Everyone today is the September 5th, 2024.

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Mark Entrekin: I am so excited to be here, this is our initial

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Mark Entrekin: podcasts for achieving unity through the power of helping others

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Mark Entrekin: by caring.

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Mark Entrekin: helping and including others in what we do on a day to day basis

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Mark Entrekin: which definitely shows the ways that we can build on promoting, understanding.

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Mark Entrekin: encouraging collaboration.

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Mark Entrekin: inspiring positive change and building a sense of community.

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Mark Entrekin: It's an exciting process, as this is a weekly

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Mark Entrekin: podcast, and we hope you can come back each week.

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Mark Entrekin: But then, as I say, weekly, I do want to say that on September 19, th

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Mark Entrekin: 2 weeks from now

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Mark Entrekin: we will be having a webinar on my course at the same time. So we will not have the podcast

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Mark Entrekin: but we will have the course

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Mark Entrekin: webinar, which we hope you'll join, and if I don't have your email address, please send it to me.

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Mark Entrekin: Always get in contact with me

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Mark Entrekin: at

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Mark Entrekin: Mark at

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Mark Entrekin: Mark

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Mark Entrekin: entry. can.com

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Mark Entrekin: let me know I'd love to have you. They'll be part of the webinar

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Mark Entrekin: so

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Mark Entrekin: little bit about me.

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Mark Entrekin: Let's talk about Dr. Mort. Dr. Mort. Welcome to the show. I am so impressed by what you do. I think I've told you this several times about being the master, on ending anger.

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Mark Entrekin: tell us a bit more about yourself and your book.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Well, 1st thanks for having me here, Mark, it's an honor to be here as your 1st guest on your new podcast. I wish you a lot. Well, hope it does well over time.

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Mark Entrekin: Thank you.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: so what would you like to know about me?

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Well.

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Mark Entrekin: 1st off you've got how many books on anger you talk to us, and you share with us so many ideas and concepts of how to eliminate anger in what we do.

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Mark Entrekin: and

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Mark Entrekin: please forgive me if I'm wrong, but I believe you have over 20 books.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, I've got. I've got 23 books over that. I've written over the last 40 years

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: on various topics related to like anger and stress mostly. And so this is my most recent one, Dr. Orman's life changing anger cure, which came out in April of 24.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: this is the one that where I really talk about how I work with people, how I've helped people to go from being angry folks to not getting angry, not reacting with anger, which is what happened for me back in my twenties and thirties, where I had a lot of anger in my life as a young man and a young doctor

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and then couldn't do anything about it for years and years and years.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Finally, after doing several years of personal development work, I figured out how I was generating the anger inside of me which nobody had ever taught me

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: to understand, and once I had those missing puzzle pieces, then I could step in and take control of reminder in a way that I didn't even think was possible. But actually it was. It was very easy. Once I knew what was really going on.

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Mark Entrekin: That's a good point. That's 1 of the things that I work with, that I enjoy. We've been on one podcast. Before we've shared one together. Of course we'll say thank you to Dr. L. For introducing us.

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Mark Entrekin: and through the Jv. Directory.

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Mark Entrekin: But one of the things that I've seen about what you do

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Mark Entrekin: with talking about anchor, and what I just heard

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Mark Entrekin: was that

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Mark Entrekin: it's a learning process.

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Mark Entrekin: How many times, as I speak of all a lot is. Our culture

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Mark Entrekin: brings anger. We allow culture to bring anger into our lives.

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Mark Entrekin: maybe from childhood, maybe from school.

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Mark Entrekin: possibly the

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Mark Entrekin: secondary schools possibly work. But we don't a lot of times

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Mark Entrekin: know what anger is.

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Mark Entrekin: but I think I heard you say that you learned about anger, and how it may originate.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, well, we know what it. We know what it is. We feel it most of the time, although some people, you know, if you grow up in a, in a family or an environment where you weren't allowed to feel anger, then you can suppress it. But most people, when they get angry. They kind of know they're angry. What they don't really know, though, is why they're angry. You know what what is? How is their brain? It's really our brain that causes us to get angry and

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: they don't understand what the process is. Internally, they they see something outside of them that they don't like.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and that triggers them to get angry. So somebody does something or doesn't do something, or.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, criticizes them in public, or lies to them or steals from them some they see the behavior outside of themselves, of other people, and sometimes same thing. If you get angry at yourself, you see that you see your own behavior, you mess something up. You forgot to do something that was important, you know. You see the behavior.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and then you feel the anger.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And and mostly that's where our education has stopped. It's it's just left the the puzzle with those 2 pieces.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and it hasn't gone further to say, well, what about the other steps that are involved that we don't see?

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And that's where that's where I

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: that's my mission is to fill in those gaps, to have people see the invisible causes of their anger which go on inside of us and in our brains. And they're not. It's a shame they're not being taught in. You can see you could teach it as early as middle School high school, certainly by college

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: people shouldn't graduate college without understanding where their emotions come from, you know, and a whole bunch of other things, but but particularly emotions, relationships, stress. Those are those are 3 big things that you should learn about in your education that aren't really being taught.

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Mark Entrekin: Well, let me touch on an idea that

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Mark Entrekin: again I love list talking to you and listening to you because there's so much

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Mark Entrekin: that what you share about anger is and emotions is so interesting to me because I deal with the psychology of it and coaching with others.

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Mark Entrekin: One of the questions I have is you talk about not knowing anger?

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Mark Entrekin: How many of us

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Mark Entrekin: no love.

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Mark Entrekin: even some of the emotions that we talk about every day, and how many times we hear the words, I love you, and

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Mark Entrekin: I love you forever. And

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Mark Entrekin: how did how was that? You saw it coming from the mind?

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Mark Entrekin: How about love compared to hey? Do we know.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, many years ago one of the most popular books ever written was the road less traveled by a psychiatrist named M. Scott Peck, and it's a whole book about how we have these crazy ideas about love and these screwed up ideas about love, and how in his patients that he saw in his psychiatry practice. They would always come in with these love issues and relationship issues.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and he traced it to a number of things that our culture teaches us about love. And and you can actually, if you really want to get the worst education possible about love, just watch.

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Mark Entrekin: Watch, the.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Bachelor of the Bachelorette, and you'll see you'll see. You'll see the.

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Mark Entrekin: Tuesday.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: That are being transmitted and the assumptions that are being conveyed so a lot of times without really speaking to them. But they're just inherent in what's being advised or what's being highlighted. And you, we get all the wrong messages for what love is. And that's consequently we have a lot of problems in that area because we don't understand the basic

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: dynamics correctly. Same thing with emotions. Yeah. And and love is an emotion. It's a sort of a well, it's actually not an emotion, but it it's partly an emotion. A lot of people don't realize love. Love is more action, your actions than it is your feelings.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know.

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Mark Entrekin: I like what you're saying. There, go! Go ahead.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's giving to other people. It's it's it's accepting other people. It's giving grace to other people, forgiving other people, appreciating other people for who they are, and communicating that to them that you, you enjoy them for their qualities.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Those are all aspects of when someone feels loved. That's what the other person or people are doing is they're giving them acceptance. They're giving them acknowledgement, they're giving them respect. They're giving them

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: all those kinds of things. And then the feelings follow from the benefits of that

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: creating that kind of a relationship.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: But.

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Mark Entrekin: And that.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Unfortunately, we tend to put the emphasis on the feelings, and forget, forget to do the actions, or we do other actions that are not very loving like anger, for example, is not a loving emotion, and and we end up wondering why our relationships fall apart.

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Mark Entrekin: That's true. And I like what you're saying about your feelings.

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Mark Entrekin: because those feelings

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Mark Entrekin: build into what we know about

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Mark Entrekin: love.

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Mark Entrekin: hate.

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Mark Entrekin: anger.

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Mark Entrekin: and we have expectations, and I like that to use the word assumptions. If we're growing up in a family that we haven't

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Mark Entrekin: felt that love, we haven't learned what love is from one reason or another.

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Mark Entrekin: How are we going to be able to grow it within ourselves, and then be able.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's never too late, because we we all grow up in families where we don't under that don't understand anger and don't convey to us. You know the truth about anger. You basically have to decide to to go search it out on your own because it's not. Gonna you're not going to get most of it in education, in standard education, even private education. You're not going to get some of the training for living life.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Well, that that you need. So you at some point, you just you decide. Yeah. My family really wasn't well equipped to provide me with this education or this knowledge or this wisdom. I gotta go out and find it myself. And so you you go out and you figure out you get you get some help, understanding what love is, how relationships work, how to how to not screw them up.

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Mark Entrekin: That's most.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Most of us are very good at, you know. Left to our own devices, we can screw up any relationship.

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Mark Entrekin: Without help. Okay, it's just built.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's just built in. But but to understand how they work and what are the behaviors, and what are the moves in relationships that are healthy, and then which ones are? You have to decide to take that on as a challenge, you know, and figure it out and get some help from people who who

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: learn the lessons the hard way. And you know there are plenty of people teaching about relationships. There's plenty of people teaching about, you know love, and there's very few people teaching anger, elimination. Like like I teach. But there, there's a lot teaching anger management which

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: I'm not that crazy about but

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: to to really understand the causes of your anger within yourself, so you can turn the anger off whenever you want to. That's to me. That's like the pinnacle of.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, anger, mastery, and and being able to deal with anger and other emotions, you could do other things for fear and guilt and worry other kinds of emotions. If you know the internal causes of them, you can. You can reach in and turn those causes off and turn the emotion off in the process.

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Mark Entrekin: Oh, that's so true, and just quickly for everyone that's listening. The end anger book.com right there. The header above Dr. Mort's slide. That's where you can go to find that more baddest book life changing anger cure.

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Mark Entrekin: So as he's mentioning, we may not know a lot about anger. I know I didn't years ago I was. I'm not angry. Sure I'm mad, but that's different. I'm anger is rage, anger is something else. But it's not right.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It could be, it could be. It's a whole spectrum, I mean. At one end is is rage and hostility and hatred, and all the stuff we're seeing, you know, in the news. And you see on social media a lot now, people punching each other on the street and ganging up on on other people and stuff like that, that's all. That's 1 extreme, but the other. The other side of anger are the little day to day annoyances and irritations, and you know things like that that can also be very damaging. I mean, that can kill a marriage.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, over time. You know little things you're annoyed about that. Just build up over time. And then people don't want to stay together, or at least one of the people don't want to stay together anymore, because they've just had enough.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So it's not. It's not the big blow up anger all the time. That's the most dangerous, although that is dangerous and bad for you. But,

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: The little kinds of anger that build up can be just as bad, and you know everybody gets irritated. Everybody gets annoyed. Everybody gets frustrated from time to time, and a lot of times. We don't use the word anger to associate those feelings with, but they are part of the anger spectrum, and they come. The importance of knowing, that is, that they have the same identical causes. It's just.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, whether you, whether you end up with little anger or huge anger. It's all coming from the same anger, producing mechanism inside the brain.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's a full.

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Mark Entrekin: Well, let's touch on.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Formula, the brain uses to create anger. Yeah.

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Mark Entrekin: Well, let's touch on that a second, and I'll make sure to tell the audience if there's some questions after this, after Doctor responds to this. I'd like to go to the audience and ask if there's any questions. But, like you talk about little bits of anger. Now, one thing my son told me

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Mark Entrekin: back when he was probably just 6 or 7 years old. He mentioned to me. He says you have like 10 seconds of anger, he said, I can see you get mad, but

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Mark Entrekin: that's all. I I took that as a compliment because it startled me@firstst

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Mark Entrekin: But you mentioned those little bits of anger, and we do all have them at times.

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Mark Entrekin: but you also mentioned they build up.

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Mark Entrekin: and you.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Can linger. I mean, I mean, you can get you can get irritated with somebody. And yeah, you're maybe irritated for a couple of minutes, but then you may keep thinking about it. You keep may keep replaying that situation, remembering the situation. That little bit of anger can stretch out over days and weeks, and sometimes months, where you're still kind of not, you know. You're still kind of harboring some negative feelings about that particular person that you had that incident with

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: so, and then sometimes it goes away. Sometimes you can make it go away quickly, like I remember. I remember Tiger Woods. I remember him being interviewed years ago, and people were asked some. The interviewer was asking him, how did he get so good at controlling his emotions on the golf course, which he's excellent at

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: on the golf course. Okay? And he said his father taught him how to do it when he was very young, and he said, his father told him. He said, tiger, you can have any emotion you want on the golf course, any emotion that comes up. You can have it as long as you don't let it last more than 8 seconds.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: If you let it last more than 8 seconds, you're doing it wrong. You got to move on to the next shot and just forget about it. And so he learned how to discipline himself to do that, and you can literally let go of something in a couple of seconds.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Whether you know the causes or not. You can just stop paying attention to it or stop making a big deal about it and move on. But a lot of times we have anger that lingers and and can cause all kinds of health problems, relationship problems problems on the job.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Problems with our kids and our marriage

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: marriages. Not to mention, you know, getting addicted to drugs because we don't know how to deal with our emotions. Well, getting into legal problems. Even getting, I mean, you could even get yourself killed. If you get angry at the wrong time, at the wrong in the wrong place. At the wrong person. So it's it's not a you know, innocuous thing. I I remember I was in a

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: a workshop a couple years ago, a very small workshop with maybe 10 people, and there was a woman in the workshop who was a mother of 4 kids.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and years ago her oldest son was in high school. He had having all kinds of problems, psychological problems, social problems. So he, the Kid, was having difficulties, but they were home one afternoon in their house.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and they got into a fight in the living room, and at the end of the fight the son turns to the mother and says, I hate you! And then he turns his back and walks away, and the mother, just in reaction, says, I hate you, too. And so the Kid walks upstairs, and she thinks he's going to his bedroom. Well, he goes to his father's room, gets his father's gun and kills himself.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know. So that's that's not to say that her anger caused that because the kid.

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Mark Entrekin: Right.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Wouldn't do that if the Kid wasn't having tremendous problems otherwise. But

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: but but that's something she felt responsible for for years.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And it it. Really, you know. Not only did she lose her son, but it put a tremendous strain on her relationship. And just, you know, feeling guilty, and all the stuff that happened as a consequence of that. So anger is not

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: thing to be, you know, tinkered with. I mean, it's it's it can be very dangerous. Yeah.

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Mark Entrekin: It's it's very true. So is it? As I mentioned, if anyone in the audience would like to ask a question, please feel free to go to your react, button at the bottom, raise your hand, or if it's at a pause.

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Mark Entrekin: please go ahead and speak up.

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Mark Entrekin: So we have Jamie and Jordan Robbie, others.

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Mark Entrekin: If you have a question.

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Mark Entrekin: please let us know

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Mark Entrekin: one of the things that you just mentioned, though, Dr. Mark, just to. I don't want to speak on. The

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Mark Entrekin: the very negatives had too long. But, as you mentioned.

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Mark Entrekin: there's a situation where

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Mark Entrekin: what she said

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Mark Entrekin: may not have caused a situation, but could there have been something said that may have been able to help prevent that situation with her son going upstairs? And then we'll talk to Jordan after that.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, there can. Yeah, I'm sure there were a lot of better things she could have done in that situation. But it was. She just reacted automatically. Like most of us do, anger is mostly a knee jerk, automatic kind of thing. We don't. We don't do any. We don't think, see something and say, I think I'm going to get angry. You know, it just happens, you know, it's just automatic.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Our body and our brains are programmed in certain situations to just automatically respond with anger. It's what you do after you get triggered. That makes all the difference. And in this case, you know, there may be in retrospect. There were obviously better things she could have done, and and not that that caused her son to do that. But it, you know. It tipped him over possibly a little bit. He probably was going to do it, anyway, at some point, if he felt that badly.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So it's not necessarily true that she should bear the main responsibility, but she did react automatically in anger, and it had a negative, you know, impact on her son. So.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Jordan, you have a question.

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Mark Entrekin: Questions.

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Mark Entrekin: Hi, Jordan, thanks for coming.

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Mark Entrekin: You're off mute, but I can't hear you.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, is your microphone engaged

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: with zoom.

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Mark Entrekin: I'm showing your microphone working, but

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Mark Entrekin: but you're off mute, anyway.

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Mark Entrekin: Can't.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Can't hear you. Yeah, but you can put it. You can put your question in the chat.

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Mark Entrekin: He's been cut.

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Mark Entrekin: and maybe you're gonna come back.

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Mark Entrekin: Okay, go back, go ahead and come back in. Sounds good.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Okay. Alright. Good.

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Mark Entrekin: Hurry back. Good to have you good to have Jamie Ravi, all of you good to be here.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: We learned sign language today.

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Mark Entrekin: Jordan's great, I should tell a quote he gave me one time. He's a good, but back to that I think you mentioned a good point.

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Mark Entrekin: and I guess that's why

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Mark Entrekin: just my situation. And I'd like to know about yours, too, Dr. Mark.

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Mark Entrekin: but my situation there's no doubt I get angry. I mean, there's times, as you say, it's a flash moment. It's it's something quick.

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Mark Entrekin: But to control that anger in that process.

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Mark Entrekin: so it doesn't carry on, and when you do the 8 seconds

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Mark Entrekin: oh, if you can do the 10 seconds

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Mark Entrekin: and then control it. So it doesn't grow, because

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Mark Entrekin: sometimes does it also feel like a seed.

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Mark Entrekin: That little bit of anger

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Mark Entrekin: is a seed that is fed. Maybe the Google.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Well, there's 2. So the the way the process goes.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: something happens

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: that triggers us.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: We automatically react with anger. Our brain automatically clicks in and does what it does to make us angry. Okay? And then at that point we have to make some choices. What are we going to do now with this anger that's already been created. One of the things another thing our brain tends to do is, it can prolong or accentuate the anger it can make us think in ways that makes us even more angry, and then more angry, and and that prolongs the anger.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And again we all along, once the anger's been created all along the way. We have some choices now as to what are we going to do in response to it? How are we going to think about it. How are we going to interpret it? I know you talk a lot about

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: helping people realize how little value there is in getting angry, and once you learn that as a lesson, and you see that it's true.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: That's something that you can work on reminding yourself whenever you get angry. Now wait a second. This is not going to give me any any positive benefits. Why am I even going to worry about continuing to be angry or stoking up my anger, or expressing my anger, or whatever, or punishing somebody out of anger, because it's just not going to pay off for me or for them.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and and that's a useful insight, because it's true most of the time that now there aren't a few occasions where anger may have some positive value. But most of the time, like you say is, no, there's no value to be found. So why, you know. So that's again, once once we got triggered, and we're gonna then we that can click in and you can bring that wisdom to bear.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: If you've learned it. And if you've embraced it, and you can say to yourself, Wait a second. You know I'm not going to go down this path that the anger wants to take me

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: okay, or my brain wants to take me. I'm going to go on a different path. And I have the ability. I have the choice to do that, you know. So that's something.

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Mark Entrekin: Exactly right. Your choice. Go ahead.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: We human beings. Our brains make us angry, kind of automatically where we don't have a lot of choice in getting angry, but once we get angry. We got a lot of choices that click in at that point. You know. How are we going to express it? How are we going to express it. Do we even need to

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: express it or continue to, you know, amplify it. And all those are decision points that we can, you know, intervene. Once we realize that we're angry.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: including what I, including what I teach people how to do, is to use each example of getting angry, to remind yourself how your brain is tricking you when you get angry. And that's really where the thing that I didn't understand about anger when I was in my twenties and thirties, even though I was

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: educated as a doctor. And I also did some psychology, you know, experimenting on my own. The thing I didn't realize is. Every time I got angry my brain was playing a trick on me.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It was distorting my perception and making me think things were true when they weren't really true, or they were maybe partially true, or but in some ways it was. My brain was leaving out stuff. It was not seeing the whole picture. It was making me believe that it was the whole picture when it wasn't so. There are lots of tricks that our brains play on us, and and nobody's telling us

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: that. That's where our anger comes from. It actually looks like

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: we're perceiving things truthfully

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: when we get angry.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: But our but.

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Mark Entrekin: And.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Our brain is making us think that at the same time it's causing us to perceive things untruthfully. So the brain is really tricky in the way it does, it hides.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It hides from us the fact that it's tricking us, which is another one of its tricks.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So.

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Mark Entrekin: Well, I like to hear what you're saying, because that's very interesting, and I've got your book. I did buy your book. I haven't had a chance to read it all the way through. But I like what you're saying about how that brain operates our brain, how it operates, and tricking us

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Mark Entrekin: to the point we have. It seems like perceptions

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Mark Entrekin: instead of reality in our own mind.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Partial perceptions, we, we only see certain things, we don't see other things. And so there are lots of holes in our perceptions, and the brain covers those holes up. You know you have a we have a hole in the each of us has a hole in the back of each of our eyes. Where the optic nerve comes into the retina, there's no, there are no retinal cells

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: in that territory in the brain. So theoretically you can't. You shouldn't be able to see in that there should be a hole in our field of vision, a small one.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: There should be a little hole in our field of vision, because there's no retinal cells

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: in when the light hits that part of the retina. Okay, but the brain just fills it in

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: it. It actually gives you a full, complete field of vision, even though you're not actually seeing everything that's there. So it's manufacturing. It fills the hole in.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So you have a continuous visual field.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: but it's a trick.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's like an optical illusion. Okay.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: But the brain and the brain has lots of tricks like that. It can make. It can add things to our perception. It can delete things from our perception, or or just remember the gorilla. You remember the gorilla? A visible gorilla experiment

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: where some psychologists set up this. I think it was Harvard. They set up this experiment where they have a bunch of people, some wearing white T-shirts, and some wearing black T-shirts, and there's about 10 of them in a group, and they're passing a basketball around

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and the the people. The test subjects are told to focus on the basketball and count the number of times the white players touch the white clothes players and the black clothes players

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: touch the ball so they're intently focusing on the basketball. And in the middle of this exercise a guy in a full gorilla suit

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: comes through a door and walks right into the middle of the group and walks right through and out the other side, and then at the end.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: they asked the people who were observing the event, how many saw the gorilla.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and more than half of them never saw the gorilla. It was just it went right through the middle of the room, and when they play the video back again they see that it was right there in the room they just there. They just were focused on one thing, and by focusing on one thing their brain deleted everything else which was parts of reality that were just sitting right there in the middle of the room. The brain, said Nope, there's nothing there so.

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Mark Entrekin: Very interesting. Yes.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: But our brains, but our brains do that all the time. So when we get angry, we have these, we have these filters.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, it may have been a female girl I don't know. It was in a gorilla suit, so I couldn't really tell.

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Mark Entrekin: To go there.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: I don't. I don't remember the exact details of the study, but it definitely could have been a female. But see, our our brains are always filtering things. So they're always. And part of the reason is, there's so much data out in the world we can't attend.

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Mark Entrekin: Exactly.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: To everything that's out there, and our brain knows that. So our brain has evolved over millions of years

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: to simplify things so that we can move around and make decisions and do what we need to do to live and get along and survive. So it it condenses things. It simplifies things. It.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It dumbs them down, and it leaves a lot of stuff out. And so, and it decides what's important and what's not important. And you know your your field of vision may be motivated differently than mine, based on your history. So certain things may be more important to you, and you'll see them, and I might attend to other things. Okay, so we'll be looking at the same thing. But our filters are going to be a little bit different. Perhaps. So the brain has these filters is my point.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and anger is caused by 3 specific filters.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and most people haven't been taught that. So.

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Mark Entrekin: I didn't know that.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: The filters are very simple. The 1st filter is when you're looking at things, you see somebody doing something or something, doing something bad and wrong that it shouldn't be doing. That's the 1st filter, bad and wrong. You have a bad and wrong judgment about whatever's happening. The second filter is that there was hurt or harm, or some negative impact being a result of that bad behavior.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Okay? And then the 3rd filter is that whoever did the bad behavior. You kind of focus in on them, like in the gorilla example, you're just looking at the basketball. And you're just focusing on that person's behavior. And that's what you see as the cause. It's like unilateral cause, I say, because you only see that. And there may have been other causes involved. But you don't see them because you're focused on that one person.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So, for example, if you're working at your computer one day, and you've just spent several hours doing some very important work. And your computer screen goes on the Fritz.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know. And you know, it's just it's just, you know, snow, or some or blue screen, or whatever. And you start to get angry at your computer.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Why did you get angry? Well, 3 filters.

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Mark Entrekin: There. Okay.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: The computer shouldn't be doing this. It's bad and wrong. The computer is doing this. It shouldn't be happening. It should work perfectly. The second filter I'm now. I'm now negatively impacted. I can't continue to work, and I may have lost the work that I just spent hours doing. And who's to blame. It's the damn computers to blame, you know.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So those are the 3 filters that cause anger, and whether you're in rage, or whether you're just a little irritated. It's all the same thing if you're standing in line, and the line's not moving fast enough.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and you're getting irritated. Well, the line's not moving fast enough. That's something that shouldn't be happening. It's wrong.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: I'm being negatively impacted. I'm in a hurry. I want to get somewhere. I can't. You know I want to get through this faster. And who's to blame? Well, whoever's holding up the line is the cashier or the the stupid people ahead of me who can't find their change, or can't find their wallet, or who knows what.

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Mark Entrekin: Writing a check!

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Going through our head? Yeah, or asking some question that you know, not having a consideration for the rest of the people online. But but there are all these filters that we have the negative, these negative views, 3 of them in a row that that our brain just automatically activates and makes us see the world through those filters. It doesn't mean that that's actually the truth about the situation. No.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: in fact, a lot of times. It's not the truth about the situation, but it looks the brain's telling us that's what's true. And so it's lying to us. It's tricking us.

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Mark Entrekin: I like what you're saying, I want to touch more about that. But let's see if jordi can get does your is your sound working now.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: No.

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Mark Entrekin: I still can't hear you. I wonder if it's on my end with the permissions? Did you get a permission question at the beginning?

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: No, I think it's his. His microphone has to be synced with. Zoom.

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Mark Entrekin: I was wondering if it asked something in the beginning.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: If you go to the mute, if you go to the microphone button to see if you're if the microphone is selected.

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Mark Entrekin: I'll have to check that on my end before the before we start again next week. But let's touch back on that while he's looking at that.

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Mark Entrekin: Dr. Moore, because what I'm hearing

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Mark Entrekin: is. And I think I wrote that book on that 1st example that you gave, which is the computer, not working because

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Mark Entrekin: I have a theoretical close relationship with Microsoft. I pay them a bundle of money every month. Excuse me, so I think they work for me.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, but that's another thing. So if you're in that situation, you're paying somebody money, and they're not delivering the way you expect they should. Then that's going to show up as something bad and wrong.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: You're now negatively impacted because you paid the money. You didn't get the benefit that you expected. That was the the deal that was a deal that was broken. And who's to blame? Microsoft.

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Mark Entrekin: Of course, it's their operating system.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, I know a lot of times, a lot of times when we're working on our computer and something doesn't work.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It could have been that we didn't bother reading the manual or the or the program that we're using. We didn't bother learning how to use it properly. And so we we made some mistake or something. And now we're blaming.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: We're blaming the computer

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: because that's what our brain will have us do. And it leaves out the part. Well, what was our role in the matter? And sometimes with a computer there is we didn't do anything in the computer or the electricity, or who knows, or the Internet, who knows what went out?

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: But even then, did we have backups? There are a lot of ways in which we could have helped

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: avoid the situation that we didn't. So all those things, all the roles that we played direct and indirect, get deleted from the scene.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and all we see is the damn computer's not working.

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Mark Entrekin: Right and that, and you bring up some some good points there, too, because it goes into something that I work with, and

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Mark Entrekin: on the fun side of the domains I have.

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Mark Entrekin: but I've got one that's it's called what the

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Mark Entrekin: frustration.

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Mark Entrekin: And I hear a lot of what you're talking about kind of goes with that that is anger based on our frustrations.

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Mark Entrekin: We just want to say what the

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Mark Entrekin: and it's the frustration inside us, is it?

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: For me. Anger and frustration are 2 different emotions with 2 different sets of filters that cause them, but they're closely related.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and a lot of times we get when we're frustrated with ourselves or a situation. We're angry at ourselves because we're expecting

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: to be able to do so.

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Mark Entrekin: Oceans.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And we're expecting to be able to do it easily.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And when we try and try and try and doesn't happen, then we get, then we deem it

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: that we're doing something wrong or something wrong is happening. It shouldn't be. It shouldn't be going this way. It should be working out, and I keep trying harder and harder.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and I'm not getting any closer, and then we get angry with ourselves. So they they kind of share some similar internal causes, but they're actually slightly different. Frustration is like a neighboring emotion. It's like right on the edge of anger. It shares some some elements of it. But it's it's actually its own emotion, but it feels

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: like anger at ourselves sometimes.

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Mark Entrekin: I'm hearing some things that you're saying on that. And we talk about getting angry with ourselves. And I know

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Mark Entrekin: it's 1 thing that I do, because I always want to look at myself first, st

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Mark Entrekin: because I know I make mistakes, but they're

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Mark Entrekin: are there. I don't know. Change into a question. Aren't there a lot of people out there that don't think the anger is any fault of their own? It's it's not their fault. They're angry, but.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Remember. That's the 3rd filter, the the 3rd filter is. It's not my fault. It's your fault. Whoever I'm angry at, it's their it's their fault. I didn't have anything to do with it.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: That's the filter. That's what the brain automatically tells us, whether it's true or not. And in a lot of cases. You know anything. If you're in a relationship with somebody

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and you get angry at that person

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: all right. One of your filters is that they're 100% responsible to blame for whatever they're doing.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Okay, never true in a relationship.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's never 100% 0 in a relationship. If you're in a relationship with somebody, and they're doing something bad and wrong. You're playing a role one way, or whether you know it or not, you're either contributing to them doing that. They're either doing it in response to something you're doing or you're you may have seen it enough times, and you didn't do anything about it. You didn't stop it.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: or you couldn't figure out how to stop it. So whatever it is, it's never 100%. They're responsible and 0%, you. So.

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Mark Entrekin: Well, let's touch on that. I think. Jordi just brought up a good point. He took put a comment out there. I believe I have seen people who are naturally prone to anger.

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Mark Entrekin: What are your thoughts.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: I have seen lots of people. No, I've seen people. It's funny when I've done a lot of workshops over the last 40 years, and a lot of them are on stress, and and I include the anger piece when I do that, so I may have 40 people any time I do a workshop. I have like 40 people or more in a room when I start talking about anger like this, and I start showing people how they can get control over their anger. Invariably a couple of people will raise their hands, and they'll be angry with me for doing that.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Their their filters, their filters will be that I'm doing something bad and wrong by teaching this material.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: by showing people how to let go of their anger or stop being angry because they are very attached to their anger.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: They think anger is a badge of something, a value or part of people have actually told me that it's part of what makes us human. If we don't have anger, then we're not human. You're taking their humanity away from them.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, which, of course, I'm not doing, but but they. They have a value system where they value anger, and they cherish their anger, and they believe it's part of who they are. They have an identity around their anger, and of course they're going to have more of it than most people, but they're not going to see that they're creating all of that, and that anger doesn't really have to be there most of the time in their life, but they've made it into a virtue, and and then they're they're now advocating.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, for anger and against anyone who would be preaching. You know you don't have to be angry.

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Mark Entrekin: Well, that's a good point, too, because I like what he, Jordan Jordi, put in there also that it

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Mark Entrekin: to many people

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Mark Entrekin: it seems that they feel

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Mark Entrekin: that through that anger

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Mark Entrekin: they have some kind of power. They're maybe it's their loud voice

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Mark Entrekin: or their action.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Anger does. Anger does have some power to it. It sets boundaries, it intimidates other people. You can sometimes get people to do what you want by getting angry at them. So there's it's.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, anger has effects on people, and people use it to dominate and control sometimes, or to make themselves feel more important or more powerful or more of a leader. You know, ordering people around, they're obviously they're usually not the most effective leadership styles. But there's some people that that's what they have perfected, and that's what they use.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So yeah, there's the anger, you know, if you're raising a young child and they start to run in the street, you know, into into traffic, and they're not looking. You may want to use anger to impress upon them the importance of, you know, the transgression they just created.

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Mark Entrekin: Oh, let me touch on that a second, because that's 1 that I'm working with that.

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Mark Entrekin: When have any of us

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Mark Entrekin: ever seen someone that is angry, even back to Jordi's comments of that that power that they think they have, whatever it may be, that they're angry.

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Mark Entrekin: that we would want to emulate or tell the story about, and feel excited or proud

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Mark Entrekin: of their lack of control, and were angry.

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Mark Entrekin: I mean, how many people said well, he was angry the other day she was angry. The day I'm going to be like them.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Well, the problem is, if you have a group of 100 onlookers, there's going to be one or 2 in that group that's going to think that's a great thing and want to use it as a role model.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: You know you may have others on the other thing that think it's the worst thing that you could do.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So there's just a whole range of way people interpret things will determine what they latch onto and pursue.

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Mark Entrekin: And like.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, most of the time. I think most of the time I'd say 95% of the time when we get angry. It's totally unnecessary. We don't need to get angry. We're getting angry because we're seeing things incorrectly, and we don't realize that that's what's going on.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So we don't realize our brain is tricking us, or we're making mistakes in perception. So.

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Mark Entrekin: Have we even learned that that's a better. There's a better way to handle that than anger.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So.

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Mark Entrekin: Person.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: To me. That's the edge. That's the those are the missing puzzle pieces.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: In our education system in terms of empowering people. To understand their emotions is to realize a lot of times. We have particularly a negative emotion, but even in a positive, you know, love, when you're in love, your brain is tricking you too.

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Mark Entrekin: Oh, I'm in trouble.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Sometimes, you know, when you and we've all had this experience, you you're infatuated. You fall in love. The the person that you're having those feelings towards they, you know. You see them through colored glasses. They can do no wrong. They have no bad qualities. They're going to be loyal. They're going to be honest, they're of good character all. Now. That's not to say that people don't have ever have those qualities, but we can be seeing them when they're not really there.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And and we, we can have a distorted set of filters. And then, later on, you interact with this person over time, and their true character comes out, you get to see how they behave in different situations. You get more experience, you know with what their strengths and weaknesses are, and you find out your filters were all wrong, you know, overall you may have had. They still may be a positive individual, and somebody you want to spend time with, or even spend your life with, but the the the false.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know picture you had in the beginning, when you were all hyped up with this infatuation, you know, and these positive feelings goes away, and then you're left with reality and hopefully, reality is still going to be good. But in some cases it turns out to be not so good, you know.

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Mark Entrekin: It does, and it seems to be a lot of times as you're talking.

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Mark Entrekin: I was portraying a little bit. That

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Mark Entrekin: anger is a lot like gambling.

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Mark Entrekin: because

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Mark Entrekin: sometimes you win.

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Mark Entrekin: sometimes that anger provides.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yes.

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Mark Entrekin: You wanted, even though there may not be any value to it. That's but you're ain't.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's like worry. It's like worry.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: We're when we worry.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's really, we're really doing a rain dance. Okay, we're getting ourselves all emotionally worked up about something in the hopes that it's going to protect a loved one or something bad is not going to happen. Okay?

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So suppose you know you're you're a parent, and your kid just got their driver's license, and they're they're taking the car out for the 1st night, and you said, be home by 10 o'clock, they said, oh, we'll be home. I'll be home, and it's 10 o'clock. They're not home, and 1112. They're not home one. They're not home, and now you're you've been worrying. Now you're worrying. Oh, my God! And part of the worry your brain tricks you into thinking. If you just worry enough. You'll keep them out of an accident.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: or you keep them from getting killed, or something like that, and then they then they come home.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And what does your brain do with that? It goes. You see, the worrying worked.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's proof that worrying, worrying protects your loved ones. So what do you do now?

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Mark Entrekin: Think it's pretty.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: What are you gonna do next time you're gonna worry again next time, because now you have this piece of evidence that you worried. And they came home safely. Okay.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So it's like.

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Mark Entrekin: So, Jordi, thank you for coming. I hope to see you also next week, I mean, I say, as long as you can, but.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yep.

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Mark Entrekin: Thank you so much for being here. But anyway, I'm sorry. Dr. Moore. Go ahead.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah. So you know, it's funny that one of the thing one, our brain is doubly and triply tricking us. And when we get angry because one of one of the things it does.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: So the 1st thing it does is it feeds us, these 3 filters

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: where they're usually flaws in the filters, but we don't notice it.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and the brain is telling us there's no flaws.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: so it gives us 3 flawed filters, and then on top of it. It says

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: there's no flaws in these filters. Trust them, they're true. Okay? So when we do that, those 2 things, when we look through the 3 filters that our brain gave us. And when we buy into the truth of the narratives, okay.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: then we get the emotion of anger.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And then what the brain does. It says, Oh, you're angry, therefore, and you have this intense feeling that feels makes you feel like you're right about what you're seeing and what your your judgments about what you're seeing. So the anger doubles back and cements your filters

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: in place

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and keeps them from being questioned, because your emotion of anger makes you feel right

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: when it was all set up. To begin with, your brain tricks you into believing something that was false, and then convinced you in several different ways. That it was true, and one of the one of the ways it convinces you is makes you believe that the feeling of anger is proof

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: that you're on the right track, and that you're seeing things accurately, which is the exact opposite of what's really happening in life and in between life and your brain and.

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Mark Entrekin: And that's like English gambling.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Insidious. It's the most insidious, self-protected system.

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Mark Entrekin: Exactly.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's.

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Mark Entrekin: Amazing.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: That it's amazing that people will break through that and go like. Wait a second. Wait a second. What my brain is telling me isn't really true, you know. I can see that. I can see now that that was

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: that was a false, you know, perception or perception, false assumption or expectation, whatever my brain was selling me wasn't really true. It's amazing that you can do that because the

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: the forces are so strong in the opposite direction to make you believe it. Okay.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: it's literally no different. And it's no different than how the media makes us angry. Today. The media knows those 3 filters that I just told you

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: their their business model depends on being able to make large numbers of people angry whenever they need to. Okay. And what they do is they feed us these 3 stories. They feed us. The story that somebody did something bad, wrong. They shouldn't have done.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know. Putin did this, or who, you know, who knows what? Okay, somebody. Somebody's gonna be hurt and harm negatively impacted. And the putin, or whoever whoever he's associating with is to blame. Okay, they feed us the 3 stories they in tell us they're true. Okay? And then they say, Trust us.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: We're your trusted source of news, and don't bother questioning anything we say. That's you know. That's.

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Mark Entrekin: That's the scary part.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: That's foolish. In fact, we're going to come after you if you question us.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: know we're lying to, even though we're lying.

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Mark Entrekin: Like.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Most of the time. If you point it out, we're going to come after you. That is.

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Mark Entrekin: That is so true, and you mentioned.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Brain is doing the exact same thing. If you watch the media you'll know what your brain is doing. You're just mimicking what your brain does.

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Mark Entrekin: And I tell you that people.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Works. Every time. It'll get you angry every time.

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Mark Entrekin: But, Dr. Morty, is that the same thing to the quote that you are like your 5, 6, 8, 10, best friends? Maybe you only have 3 friends, but you're like the people that you hang around.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, well, you'll gravitate. Well, you'll sort yourself out. In other words, if you're around people and you're sharing how you see things, and they're disagreeing with you, you know. There, then, you're gonna eventually part ways with them. And you're gonna collect people in your in your orbit that is, are going to agree with you, and are, gonna you know, acknowledge you and are going to support you and cheer you on. And that's how you end up with a select. You've sifted through a whole bunch of people to get those 5 people.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And so they have a lot. Their perceptual systems and filters usually have a lot in common

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: with yours, and they don't rattle your feathers

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: or rattle your cage as much as other people who don't share those same filters.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Probably that's how we get the bubbles, you know, you associate with people that think and feel the way you do interpret the way you do. And so they're not. Gonna when you say something completely stupid and completely wrong, they're not going to call you on it.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Okay. But if you're in another group of people who

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: are just looking at what you said, and and objectively, you know, judging it, they may tell you you're full of crap, and you may be, yeah. But the people.

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Mark Entrekin: But you don't want to hear that.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: The people around. You aren't going to be telling you.

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Mark Entrekin: That's right. Those people that you're 5 or 6 ever you're the closest people will be family friends, works, work associates, whoever those people may be, that is still going to plant. I mentioned, like I mentioned earlier, plant that seed.

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Mark Entrekin: and then it's up to you, if you allow it to grow or not.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: How our filters. That's how our filters get reinforced because they're constantly being tested and reinforced. And and

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know the other people around you are going to feed into your filters most of the time and give them more power and more strength, and then they just they just operate and do what they do

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: again on an automatic sort of knee-jerk basis.

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Mark Entrekin: Okay, well, let me change the subject here just a little bit, because I like what you said earlier about for me. I didn't know I had. When I got out of college I knew everything. Nobody knew something that I didn't know. I I and I know that. Okay, I wish that was true. But how many of us go through that?

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Mark Entrekin: When should we? And you know, like the word should? When must we? When must we start teaching the things that you're sharing in your book

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Mark Entrekin: life changing anger cure. When is there a good time to start doing that you mentioned earlier? You have to know about college. But what do we do?

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: I think middle School Middle School is definitely appropriate. I know when when my book came out, you know, as an author on Amazon, you can order author copies at a discounted rate. So I got my 1st box of 15 books that I ordered, and what I did the next very next morning I go out for a walk every morning short walk, but I go past a group of middle school students waiting for the bus.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and I pass them going out, and I turn around, and IA block or 2 later I pass them coming back, and I have been passing them for over a year. You know we didn't. We don't really talk that much, but maybe we acknowledge each other once in a while, but anyhow, I grab 5 5 or 6 copies of the book.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and I went on my walk, and when I got up to the group of kids I handed each of them a copy of the book, and I said, Hey, I wanna give you this gift. Take a look at it when I come back around in 60 seconds, or whatever it is. You can give it back to me or keep it. Whatever you want to do, it's fine with me. Okay. So I did. I turned around and I came back, and all of them decided to keep it, which shocked the hell out of me. But anyhow

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: but but that was my 1st impulse is, I want to put this in the hands of these middle school students, who I pass every day and don't have really much personal interaction with. But

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: they're in my, they're my life and and I wanted to share this with them. I wanted to put this in their hands because I wanted to do it for more kids that age. And and I wanted them to be the 1st group that I that I gave it to. So that was my initial impulse like this is your 1st podcast. That was my.

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Mark Entrekin: Okay.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: That was the 1st thing my 1st thought was.

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Mark Entrekin: Book, cast.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Give that. Do a book cast. Give it to these kids. And

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: yeah, but that's what I want to get it into schools. I want to get it into middle schools, high schools, colleges, and also the other great place for it. Any kind of anybody who's doing coaching life, coaching.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: health coaching where they're working with people it could be. I've worked with several divorce coaches because anger comes up a lot.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, around divorces. So anybody that's working with people where anger is going to be a big issue for them, and the coach could help them. I and I've trained a number of coaches in in this methodology, so they can be better at helping their clients when they come to them with anger issues that they don't know how to deal with.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and and a coach can. A coach can get this book and study it themselves, and then and then advise their clients to go get it, and then the coach can coach them through the procedures of the blueprint that I outline in the book, because it it would be helpful to have somebody to work through some of those things with you. Yeah.

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Mark Entrekin: That middle school option that you're bringing up, I think, is that that's is that's almost like the perfect way

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Mark Entrekin: to start us. Because isn't middle school the time.

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Mark Entrekin: and I'm very strong on being non gender.

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Mark Entrekin: But I do know that about that.

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Mark Entrekin: That age, that 7th

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Mark Entrekin: 8th grade. We're also coming about ourselves.

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Mark Entrekin: as far as being

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Mark Entrekin: stronger, more

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Mark Entrekin: forceful, or not.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah, more software.

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Mark Entrekin: Time when self-aware.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And also more aware of the world. You know of how the world works. You know.

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Mark Entrekin: So if we can get that book, that teaching.

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Mark Entrekin: and

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Mark Entrekin: to the into their hands like you're doing, give them that option. But even maybe put it into a course

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Mark Entrekin: somewhere in that. What do you say? 7, th 8th grade. Start looking at a book like yours and showing that

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00:53:13.070 --> 00:53:23.439
Mark Entrekin: this is a situation that we are all going to come across, whether we want to or not, and most of us by that time frame have come across it probably more times than we

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Mark Entrekin: wanted to.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah. And and I tell. And I I tell people this looks like it's a book just about anger. And it is. I only talk about anger in the book. But actually, it's a book about all emotions. If if you understand how anger works and how our brain tricks us to cause us to get angry. Then you can understand how your brain that your brain is tricking you whenever you have anxiety

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00:53:46.080 --> 00:53:55.680
Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: many, much of the time, not always whenever you have guilt, whenever you have worry. As we talked about just for a minute ago, whenever you have sadness, your brain is playing tricks on you

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: that either create or prolong those emotions. And and if you understand, anger is like the the lead in emotion. If you understand anger well, since almost everybody experiences it from time to time. If you understand that well, you'll realize

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: your brain anytime. Your brain's giving you a negative emotion. It's coming from the same

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: general mechanism of several filters. Your brain's making, you believe are true may not be true.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Your job. It's like in the mission, impossible. Thing your mission. Should you choose to accept.

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00:54:28.030 --> 00:54:28.670
Mark Entrekin: Accept it.

443
00:54:29.270 --> 00:54:30.030
Mark Entrekin: There you go!

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Is to is to invent. Once you figure out the the 3 main filters, and usually there's only 3, the 3 main filters that are causing a particular emotion like anger. Your job now is to figure out where the flaws are in those filters, that your brain is hiding from you

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and telling you are not there, but they are.

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Mark Entrekin: I think that's a very good point, because to understand which of those filters and what's true and not true. And what have we come to, as we mentioned earlier, as I focus on that culture, that learning, what have we learned in our perspective.

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00:55:04.090 --> 00:55:12.740
Mark Entrekin: our perceptions of what we're doing and what we're not doing, and how we can carry that forward in a positive manner.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Yeah. And if enough people understand their own anger and realize that their brain's tricking them when they're angry, and they may have bought into some false

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: if you can imagine. You know

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: millions of people being on that same page.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Everybody, you know, we're all walking around triggering each other all day long. Okay, but if we understood what was getting triggered inside of us and realized a lot of it is Kaka, you know, that we're buying into. Then, you know, that takes away a lot of the anger that people just get plugged into and just becomes runaway anger. And then they start doing all kinds of crazy things

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and striking out other people. And then that gets retaliation. And it creates the mess. And we see in the world today with all this hatred and hostility and disunity, because everybody's in their own bubble of false filters.

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Mark Entrekin: And some.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Don't realize they're false.

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Mark Entrekin: And so much that we hear on simple things, such as road rage.

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Mark Entrekin: just a simple thing as somebody just pulling in front of you or me, and

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Mark Entrekin: 1st we label them what kind of person they are.

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Mark Entrekin: Go through your 3 filters, but we're angry. We're flipping them off, whatever it might be yelling

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Mark Entrekin: choice words.

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Mark Entrekin: and that ability to understand back to what you talked about earlier, and thank you for mentioning. That is where I come from is, where is the value in that road range

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Mark Entrekin: back to.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Only value. If there is value. There could be value in that road. Rage.

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Mark Entrekin: How was that?

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: The value is, if you use that road rage

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: to remind yourself of how faulty your brain filters are

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: each time it happens.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: and you actually dig in and you challenge it, and you question it, and you and you see through them. And you realize, oh, wait a second. I got angry because I had a false idea. Maybe I judged. Maybe I judged the person in the car ahead of me to be a

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: inconsiderate, stupid person, and maybe they're not

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: okay. That was just my judgment. I projected onto them. Well, when you start to see that, that's what your brain does then. And you do that a hundred times.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: you know, than the 100 and 1st time you're less likely to buy into that judgment. You're more forgiving. You're more compassionate. You're more understanding. You know you're more willing to give Grace to that person who's screwing up in front of you or doing whatever they're doing, because you you realize that your brain is a machine that that constantly misinterprets reality and and sends it to you as if it's true when it's not.

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Mark Entrekin: And that's a good point, and that's 1 of the things that I try to do. And sometimes the things I do are a little bit on the crazy side, but I can just say

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Mark Entrekin: sorry I was in your way. I hope you get home soon enough that you don't miss the start of whatever program that is that you're watching. And maybe it is that bachelor bachelorette program you talked about earlier.

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Mark Entrekin: I hope you get there in time.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Sarcasm or honest compassion.

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Mark Entrekin: Sarcasm, but it still, but it still helps me. I just, you know. I hope you get there in time. I hope it's a good show, because.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Well, you make it. You take that.

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Mark Entrekin: No value.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: You take the edge off of it, it makes you're playing with it a little bit, which makes it less serious, you know, you know, and you're less locked into the seriousness of it, which is good.

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Mark Entrekin: That's where I find that value. Because, as we talked about, where is the value in that.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: And you're right. There's usually there's usually no value in the anger, because.

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Mark Entrekin: Somebody send you a check.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: It's coming from a false place.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: but we think it's coming from a true place, which is our big error.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: We have it exactly backwards most of the time.

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Mark Entrekin: And I talk about.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: That's our brain keeps us trapped in our anger because

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: it it doesn't encourage us to question the narratives. It's sending us.

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Mark Entrekin: That's so true.

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Mark Entrekin: You know, Dr. Moore, I, I think we could talk to you for hours on and you share there's so many insights that I wish I would have heard back in middle school. Why didn't you write that book

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Mark Entrekin: just a couple of years ago, when I was in middle school, because it would have helped me so much. But I thank you so much for what you're doing, and thank you for being here. It's an honor always to talk with you.

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Mark Entrekin: and again, your Urls at the top of your screen, and.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: I'll put it in the chat as well.

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Mark Entrekin: If you would please.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: There we go!

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Mark Entrekin: Thank you. Put that in there because it's a good book. And again I have it on my screen. Right now. I have it through the

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Mark Entrekin: straight back up. What's the

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Mark Entrekin: it's called Kimball in Kimball that I use. I've got the book there so I can read it whenever I want to. It's excellent. It's a good reference. We'll refer back to it. But again, thank you so much. I appreciate you being here. Everyone else is here.

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Mark Entrekin: Thank you for being here. I'm

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Mark Entrekin: coming to see Dr. Morton is always.

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Mark Entrekin: It's a joy for me. Hope. It's a joy for you, Dr. Moore. I'm hoping I can have you back, maybe

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Mark Entrekin: couple of months.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Sure.

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Mark Entrekin: Bring up some more. I'd love to have that, and on that.

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Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: Best wishes with the podcast I wish you a lot of success with it, and.

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Mark Entrekin: Thank you.

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01:00:07.180 --> 01:00:09.299
Dr. Mort--Anger Elimination: I think you're doing good work in the world.

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Mark Entrekin: I appreciate. That means means a world to me for that to come from you because of what you have done and what you accomplished. And that puts on the point that this

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Mark Entrekin: podcast is weekly, except for September 19, th 2,024, we're going to be having a webinar on that date which hope everyone will let me know their email address. I can send you that link which I'll put it in the

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Mark Entrekin: chat in just a second, and we won't be here on Thanksgiving Day. We're gonna hope everybody has a fun Thanksgiving with their family, with their friends, whoever they might be with. We will not be here on Thanksgiving Day. We'll be here on September 19th of this year.

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Mark Entrekin: but this is a continual process of learning from people like Dr. Mort. And then on that same note, we're going to be back here for next week, and we're going to be talking to

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Mark Entrekin: Dr. Janice Fortman, who is a relationship coach.

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Mark Entrekin: She registered shipping communication code, who helps individuals improve their communication skills and relationships both personally and professionally. So again, Dr. Morton, thank you so much. Thank you to all of our audience. Thank you for being here, Jamie Robby, all of you already here earlier, all the others. Thank you so much for being here. I hope to see you again next week, Dr. Morton. I'm looking forward to seeing you again soon, talking to you as well. Thank you. Everyone. Take a copy of the chat.

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Mark Entrekin: Here's the Nest information.

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Mark Entrekin: So we want to talk more.

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Mark Entrekin: Thank you. All. Enjoy your day.

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01:01:31.630 --> 01:01:32.370
Mark Entrekin: I know.

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Mark Entrekin: Cheers.

Episode 1: Dr. Mort Orman

Dr. Mort Orman

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