WEBVTT
1
00:00:02.670 --> 00:00:08.230
Mark Entrekin: Hi everyone and welcome to our weekly podcast achieving unity.
2
00:00:08.990 --> 00:00:18.900
Mark Entrekin: success one step at a time. It is the success formula, Hello, everyone. My name is Mark Intrakin, and I am excited that you're here.
3
00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:37.770
Mark Entrekin: and I hope you have this on your calendar, and you come back every week, and I know most of you will also go to. I shouldn't say most. But a lot of you will go to our website and view the recording of this. And if you do, please feel free to give feedback, I'll give a site just a minute how you can contact me, contact us and get feedback on it
4
00:00:37.940 --> 00:00:43.060
Mark Entrekin: always ask for the free Achieving Unity guide. Now, B
5
00:00:43.450 --> 00:00:56.219
Mark Entrekin: site is on the screen. You can go to the URL. Is at the top. The QR code at the bottom left so many ways of communication. I just hope you will communicate with us more, and always
6
00:00:57.130 --> 00:01:08.559
Mark Entrekin: creating solutions, one reality, one reality at a time. This is a picture of our website. I hope you will go out there. www.arcintricin.com www, dot achievingunity.com.
7
00:01:08.780 --> 00:01:14.060
Mark Entrekin: There's many paths to get here. But let's get here and take it to the next level.
8
00:01:15.350 --> 00:01:21.849
Mark Entrekin: As mentioned, achieving unity, success formula. This is building the formula for achieving unity.
9
00:01:21.950 --> 00:01:25.549
Mark Entrekin: or that success today and tomorrow
10
00:01:25.700 --> 00:01:33.869
Mark Entrekin: again, weekly podcast every Wednesday, one pm. Pacific time, 4 Pm. Eastern time. Again, hope. You put it on your calendar
11
00:01:34.580 --> 00:01:36.589
Mark Entrekin: love to see on a weekly basis.
12
00:01:37.330 --> 00:01:47.180
Mark Entrekin: reality focused dynamics delivers success, focused solutions. You can see that over in the top, right in our logo.
13
00:01:47.380 --> 00:01:52.039
Mark Entrekin: relative focus dynamics from left to right. Success focus solutions from top to bottom.
14
00:01:52.490 --> 00:01:55.590
Mark Entrekin: Please contact us today for more information on
15
00:01:55.810 --> 00:02:02.500
Mark Entrekin: number one using agile and lean inside and outside of computer software.
16
00:02:02.660 --> 00:02:07.520
Mark Entrekin: The agile manifesto URL in the bottom right, was 1st written for software.
17
00:02:07.740 --> 00:02:11.200
Mark Entrekin: But as I've worked with it, I'm certified in the
18
00:02:11.990 --> 00:02:16.259
Mark Entrekin: team, agile as well as safe or scaled, agile, also
19
00:02:16.890 --> 00:02:22.250
Mark Entrekin: certified. I tell, as I learned the processes, I see more and more every day.
20
00:02:22.440 --> 00:02:35.700
Mark Entrekin: It is not just for associations. It's not just for corporations. It's not just for organizations. The different facets of agile and scrum and Kanban, Dsdm, all of them Xp.
21
00:02:35.940 --> 00:02:39.920
Mark Entrekin: They all can be used in the family environment as well.
22
00:02:40.530 --> 00:02:45.759
Mark Entrekin: So you might ask, what is agile, agile is the ability
23
00:02:45.860 --> 00:02:51.410
Mark Entrekin: that each of us have to create and respond to changes and improvements.
24
00:02:51.560 --> 00:02:57.310
Mark Entrekin: Changes are short term improvements are long term. That's what we want to build for our final goal.
25
00:02:57.870 --> 00:03:01.379
Mark Entrekin: It enables us agile enables us success
26
00:03:01.500 --> 00:03:17.839
Mark Entrekin: in uncertain and possibly struggling environments by emphasizing adaptability through better collaboration and better communication. Yes, it works in the corporate environment, but it does work in the family social community environments as well.
27
00:03:18.500 --> 00:03:24.570
Mark Entrekin: Lean is a methodology focused on maximizing value by minimizing waste.
28
00:03:24.780 --> 00:03:29.469
Mark Entrekin: It optimizes our processes through continuous improvement.
29
00:03:29.680 --> 00:03:34.339
Mark Entrekin: We see something. It doesn't work, that's improvement. Let's make it so. It can work.
30
00:03:34.470 --> 00:03:38.560
Mark Entrekin: This includes effectiveness and efficiency.
31
00:03:38.780 --> 00:03:47.820
Mark Entrekin: The philosophy can be used in every discipline, every vertical around the world, including our homes and our family.
32
00:03:50.300 --> 00:03:55.080
Mark Entrekin: connect with me, and I'll show you more on how to break down all issues.
33
00:03:55.470 --> 00:04:07.030
Mark Entrekin: products and services from the most complex business projects, including rocket science. And yes, I've worked for Lockheed Martin and Boeing and other rocket organizations and companies.
34
00:04:07.340 --> 00:04:13.670
Mark Entrekin: but it works from there down to the basic steps of training our teenagers. Yes, it does
35
00:04:13.860 --> 00:04:24.919
Mark Entrekin: wid bid rid it down, break it down, review its dependencies, get it done. We can do that
36
00:04:25.300 --> 00:04:27.660
Mark Entrekin: personally and professionally.
37
00:04:29.110 --> 00:04:39.350
Mark Entrekin: Think of busy mornings at a family breakfast. Everyone has somewhere to go, something to do, from work to school to many other events, many of the locations that they need to be.
38
00:04:40.140 --> 00:04:45.190
Mark Entrekin: One of the things that we can do is have a family stand up meeting each evening.
39
00:04:45.800 --> 00:04:55.369
Mark Entrekin: during which everyone shares their needs or task the next day. Then they put those on the refrigerator on little sticky notes, the things that need to be done that next morning.
40
00:04:56.380 --> 00:05:01.219
Mark Entrekin: maybe the chores, the responsibilities. Then that next morning, when the
41
00:05:01.490 --> 00:05:13.650
Mark Entrekin: little sticky note task or need is done, you move that from the done column. I'm sorry for the to do column to the done column that we can keep up with everything that's going on, and if somebody's running behind
42
00:05:14.350 --> 00:05:24.480
Mark Entrekin: something that you could do is create a breakfast station with preportioned ingredients and a weekly meal plan. Small cereal boxes, certain amount of food over here on one plate that we can dip from.
43
00:05:24.670 --> 00:05:27.389
Mark Entrekin: It's all about organizing the process.
44
00:05:28.470 --> 00:05:36.699
Mark Entrekin: minimizing decision, fatigue, all the decision that has to all the decisions that have to be made, minimizing that
45
00:05:36.810 --> 00:05:47.199
Mark Entrekin: and then reducing the time. Searching for items, can help everyone participate in a much much smoother and more efficient process.
46
00:05:49.390 --> 00:06:03.369
Mark Entrekin: achieving unity. Number 2, achieving unity through encouragement, inspiration, and inclusion. This is our main drive, because I put this in the middle because it affects it works directly with agile
47
00:06:03.700 --> 00:06:10.990
Mark Entrekin: and lean and also impact and work within my next section, which I'll talk to about in Number 3,
48
00:06:11.510 --> 00:06:17.270
Mark Entrekin: because encouragement can be the powerful force that fuels the core of empowerment.
49
00:06:17.780 --> 00:06:23.110
Mark Entrekin: powerful force that fuels the core of empowerment, empowering others.
50
00:06:23.330 --> 00:06:26.030
Mark Entrekin: encourage others to help accomplish their goals.
51
00:06:26.700 --> 00:06:35.610
Mark Entrekin: inspire each other to achieve every goal. Unity makes us a successful team, include others
52
00:06:35.780 --> 00:06:44.420
Mark Entrekin: and celebrate every victory, both personally and professionally together, all of us
53
00:06:44.980 --> 00:06:49.510
Mark Entrekin: in unity. We can overcome every challenge.
54
00:06:51.790 --> 00:06:59.980
Mark Entrekin: Now number 3 unity starts at home, it shapes society, it transformed workplaces.
55
00:07:00.460 --> 00:07:04.099
Mark Entrekin: and we talk about it. At the home. We have to think about simple things, such as.
56
00:07:04.250 --> 00:07:07.670
Mark Entrekin: are we? Are we facing relationship challenges?
57
00:07:08.910 --> 00:07:12.979
Mark Entrekin: Are we facing things as a parent? Are we having parenting difficulties?
58
00:07:13.520 --> 00:07:16.000
Mark Entrekin: Are you? Maybe someone, you know.
59
00:07:16.230 --> 00:07:21.730
Mark Entrekin: struggling with relationship issues or parenting time issues as a divorced or divorcing parent.
60
00:07:22.130 --> 00:07:25.539
Mark Entrekin: We want to know about these things and to be able to help in these areas.
61
00:07:25.990 --> 00:07:34.310
Mark Entrekin: We want to transform those frustrations into understanding with what? The frustration?
62
00:07:35.040 --> 00:07:44.500
Mark Entrekin: Where is the value interactions? Aren't they based on those frustrations, the anger, the hate, the prejudice, don't those come from a frustration that we encountered?
63
00:07:45.100 --> 00:07:53.110
Mark Entrekin: We must realize that anger, a NGER. Holds no value nowhere.
64
00:07:53.590 --> 00:07:57.780
Mark Entrekin: Anger is just actions not gaining effective results.
65
00:07:58.150 --> 00:07:59.580
Mark Entrekin: That's why we get angry
66
00:07:59.830 --> 00:08:06.619
Mark Entrekin: that anger not gaining those effective results. We need to learn to control that. We'll talk about more about that with Frank. In a few minutes
67
00:08:07.180 --> 00:08:13.369
Mark Entrekin: life happens from personal relationships to parenting, time to even prenuptial agreements.
68
00:08:13.520 --> 00:08:21.209
Mark Entrekin: Nuptials not required. A lot of us are getting together these days, and not getting married because of the problems and difficulties in our court system.
69
00:08:21.630 --> 00:08:26.760
Mark Entrekin: But we can learn to embrace and enjoy every moment and every challenge together
70
00:08:26.870 --> 00:08:36.419
Mark Entrekin: by break writing it down, breaking it down, review our dependencies on each other and get it done. Get that love in gear. We can do that
71
00:08:36.850 --> 00:08:43.439
Mark Entrekin: one vision, one goal achieving unity in all areas of our life.
72
00:08:45.170 --> 00:09:13.159
Mark Entrekin: My course is coming up. Yay, hope you look into it. 7 steps to achieving unity, success, formula, living life fully through present moment awareness. The course is going to start on April 3.rd It's a Thursday before 7 sessions. They'll be for 90 min long. Start at one Pm. Pacific time. Same time as this. 4 Pm. Eastern time. It is a 7 module live online course, practical journey with me.
73
00:09:14.090 --> 00:09:16.850
Mark Entrekin: It's about discovering those essential practices.
74
00:09:16.990 --> 00:09:26.840
Mark Entrekin: the ones for cultivating and integrating mindful presence, to enhance our innate qualities, enabling each and every one of us to live more freely
75
00:09:27.050 --> 00:09:28.569
Mark Entrekin: and authentically
76
00:09:30.030 --> 00:09:38.830
Mark Entrekin: by caring, helping, and including others, we can achieve a deeper sense of unity and connection at home
77
00:09:39.450 --> 00:09:43.730
Mark Entrekin: with our families at work, and socially.
78
00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:49.470
Mark Entrekin: the QR. Codes on the right check into it. Let me know what you think. Please feel free to sign up
79
00:09:50.460 --> 00:09:52.849
Mark Entrekin: also our website, home.
80
00:09:53.700 --> 00:09:55.149
Mark Entrekin: QR. Codes on the left
81
00:09:55.330 --> 00:10:00.910
Mark Entrekin: contact page. You want to contact me. Use that QR code on the right. Get in, cut. Touch with me.
82
00:10:01.310 --> 00:10:08.500
Mark Entrekin: It's all about the power of encouraging, inspiring, and including others, personally and professionally.
83
00:10:09.040 --> 00:10:10.870
Mark Entrekin: Our next podcast is coming up.
84
00:10:11.390 --> 00:10:17.629
Mark Entrekin: We have Raja coming in on the invisible disabilities to increase our profitabilities. On March 12, th
85
00:10:18.160 --> 00:10:22.100
Mark Entrekin: Janet Mcconnell coming in on ignite fitness on March 19, th
86
00:10:22.680 --> 00:10:30.240
Mark Entrekin: keeping the focus on people. The greatest asset, Jason Joey. He'll be here on March 26, th
87
00:10:30.740 --> 00:10:40.140
Mark Entrekin: have storytelling, effective marketing successes, ability for us to tell those stories tell them clearly. Alison Verhelan, Verheland.
88
00:10:40.290 --> 00:10:41.740
Mark Entrekin: On April second.
89
00:10:41.990 --> 00:11:02.039
Mark Entrekin: we have leadership, resilience, and team retention with Rose Harrow on April 9.th Remember, we have these going on every week. Please join in the month of June will be all about fathers 4 weeks about fathers and dads being that masculine, gentlemanly person. They can be the good father, the good parent.
90
00:11:02.140 --> 00:11:06.120
Mark Entrekin: In August we're going to have 4 sessions on mothers.
91
00:11:06.270 --> 00:11:12.530
Mark Entrekin: on moms, and all the great things they do and have done since life began.
92
00:11:12.650 --> 00:11:13.760
Mark Entrekin: That's coming.
93
00:11:14.090 --> 00:11:19.160
Mark Entrekin: Pitch in, ask questions like to see on each and every one of them.
94
00:11:20.480 --> 00:11:27.399
Mark Entrekin: And now our treat of the day, I'm excited. Frank and I've known each other a while. We know each other through toastmasters.
95
00:11:27.610 --> 00:11:33.550
Mark Entrekin: Well, Frank Dominicus, it's an independent human resource trainer.
96
00:11:34.160 --> 00:11:38.950
Mark Entrekin: Frank has been an independent human trainer for over 4 decades.
97
00:11:39.140 --> 00:11:41.820
Mark Entrekin: I thought. He's only about 39 years old. To begin with.
98
00:11:42.470 --> 00:11:49.160
Mark Entrekin: his main lanes are strategic planning, leadership and productive conflict. We'll learn more about that in a minute. Also.
99
00:11:49.620 --> 00:11:52.969
Mark Entrekin: with an interdisciplinary educational background.
100
00:11:53.090 --> 00:12:04.130
Mark Entrekin: He has been on the cutting edge of effective education and is a vintage. Everything disc trainer. We'll go into that few more interviews in a little bit. Also
101
00:12:04.280 --> 00:12:05.849
Mark Entrekin: he has something to give you.
102
00:12:06.250 --> 00:12:17.589
Mark Entrekin: He provides insightful and transformational learning experiences. He supports organization, success through effective development, coaching, professional skill, development.
103
00:12:17.790 --> 00:12:26.549
Mark Entrekin: and as a global goodwill. Ambassador, advisory and marketing support for good causes. Rank is a person to talk to.
104
00:12:26.810 --> 00:12:27.939
Mark Entrekin: But guess what?
105
00:12:28.910 --> 00:12:31.790
Mark Entrekin: Under the hood, everyone that's here
106
00:12:32.050 --> 00:12:34.890
Mark Entrekin: at the end of our podcast today.
107
00:12:35.000 --> 00:12:40.710
Mark Entrekin: Frank wants to give a free copy of his Pdf on productive
108
00:12:40.860 --> 00:12:45.310
Mark Entrekin: conflict. So hang on, hang on tight. We'll go through that just a minute.
109
00:12:45.480 --> 00:12:51.650
Mark Entrekin: Let me stop the share. Let's go over here and let's bring Frank on board.
110
00:12:52.520 --> 00:12:54.209
Mark Entrekin: Frank. How are you today?
111
00:12:55.390 --> 00:12:58.569
Frank DeDominicis: I'm happy to be here. Thank you for the invitation.
112
00:12:58.570 --> 00:13:06.240
Mark Entrekin: Oh, my pleasure! Thank you, Frank, just a second. Let me get my screen set up. I'm gonna have to turn this over to Renee. She could do this so much better than I could
113
00:13:11.660 --> 00:13:16.769
Mark Entrekin: things in the way. Here, PIN you the 1st screen
114
00:13:17.740 --> 00:13:19.640
Mark Entrekin: up here, and I'll PIN me next to you.
115
00:13:23.400 --> 00:13:33.909
Mark Entrekin: and I think we're together. Frank. Congratulations on all the great work that you're doing. Thank you for being here. This is awesome, and I'm so excited to have you here today.
116
00:13:34.650 --> 00:13:39.070
Mark Entrekin: Let me start off with the very 1st question. Well, first, st let's tell me about your tell us about yourself
117
00:13:39.560 --> 00:13:40.610
Mark Entrekin: and
118
00:13:41.090 --> 00:13:48.270
Mark Entrekin: what you've done for the last 40 years. Those last 40 decades give us a little few clues about who Frank is.
119
00:13:48.810 --> 00:13:58.080
Frank DeDominicis: But let me go back to 60 years, because the values that drive me now are the same values I had as a teenager.
120
00:13:58.280 --> 00:14:07.440
Frank DeDominicis: You know, I was a rebellious young. They used to call us Radicals, but that doesn't mean what it means today. It meant change agents back then.
121
00:14:07.690 --> 00:14:09.630
Frank DeDominicis: So I was very much involved in
122
00:14:09.740 --> 00:14:18.030
Frank DeDominicis: community service, and later, in my twenties, I worked in community action programs. I was always given to be an helpful.
123
00:14:18.250 --> 00:14:23.590
Frank DeDominicis: It was in the seventies when I was involved with the community action programs that I
124
00:14:23.760 --> 00:14:28.259
Frank DeDominicis: became initially involved with training. My boss noticed that I was
125
00:14:28.630 --> 00:14:37.940
Frank DeDominicis: not the most polished manager. I'll just put it that way. I would have quite the discussion with that young Frank today, but my boss was
126
00:14:38.190 --> 00:14:39.470
Frank DeDominicis: come in good enough
127
00:14:39.640 --> 00:15:01.180
Frank DeDominicis: to put me through leadership, effectiveness, training, which was one of the Big 5. At that time organization development was just beginning to merge traditional Peter Drucker management by objectives type of training with soft skills. It was the larger organizations that had the luxury of time and money to do that.
128
00:15:01.390 --> 00:15:25.620
Frank DeDominicis: So I went through what I did not expect. My 1st transformational experience at a time in my life when I was young and needed organization and goal clarity, and most importantly proper communication with people. I was simply someone who did not know that listening is a skill. I thought listening was what you did while you waited for your turn to talk.
129
00:15:28.080 --> 00:15:29.573
Mark Entrekin: Well, said
130
00:15:30.560 --> 00:15:41.309
Frank DeDominicis: So, to make a long story short, the the teams that I supervise I was supervising 4 managers and 36 or 40 line people.
131
00:15:41.620 --> 00:15:51.259
Frank DeDominicis: But over time things change because I applied what I learned about leadership, very, very elemental things about leadership starting just with listening.
132
00:15:51.470 --> 00:15:58.520
Frank DeDominicis: Also, I had a being a young quote, unquote, positive activist, community activist, I also
133
00:15:58.810 --> 00:16:02.600
Frank DeDominicis: was sensitive to injustice, which I think most people are.
134
00:16:02.910 --> 00:16:16.610
Frank DeDominicis: So I was part of a group that exposed bad bad business practices in the factories in my neighborhood. In Philadelphia a group of us would go in and take photographs of unsafe working conditions and.
135
00:16:16.610 --> 00:16:17.550
Mark Entrekin: Wow!
136
00:16:17.550 --> 00:16:21.210
Frank DeDominicis: Or one person would go and pretend to apply for a job.
137
00:16:21.430 --> 00:16:30.829
Frank DeDominicis: and then every week we would publish at the back of our Community newsletter an expose on what companies need need to be exposed. So.
138
00:16:31.130 --> 00:16:39.390
Frank DeDominicis: although that was the very seed of my activism, I also knew that I was destined to
139
00:16:39.620 --> 00:16:47.490
Frank DeDominicis: influence others. Forgive me if it sounds egotistical, but I remember my mom putting her shoulder her hand on my shoulder
140
00:16:47.650 --> 00:17:01.870
Frank DeDominicis: when I told her when I was young. I'm going to not be in the system. I'm going to be outside to help doctor it and make it more humane. And she said, Frankie. Someday you're going to influence a lot of people, and I happen to believe that so.
141
00:17:02.170 --> 00:17:03.100
Mark Entrekin: I agree.
142
00:17:03.290 --> 00:17:08.920
Frank DeDominicis: Never underestimate the power of your words, especially when you're speaking to young people.
143
00:17:09.710 --> 00:17:19.249
Frank DeDominicis: So that led me to a series of licenses with various major training companies. 40 years ago
144
00:17:19.510 --> 00:17:34.989
Frank DeDominicis: I was leading intensive, personal, intensive. That was very popular at the time Eslin Institute was using tea groups, sensitivity groups. We were sitting in circles more like group therapy and working out what was best for the organization.
145
00:17:35.200 --> 00:17:44.660
Frank DeDominicis: That was a good model. It had both skills-based trainings available which I participated in. And there were also other types of
146
00:17:45.980 --> 00:17:57.619
Frank DeDominicis: intensives that I did not subscribe to that were also intensive. But they're more like tear down the personality and rebuild them. Type of programs which I don't subscribe to.
147
00:17:58.070 --> 00:18:07.320
Frank DeDominicis: I was able in just recently in the past, say 15 years, to merge what I learned about traditional management objectives with soft skills
148
00:18:07.610 --> 00:18:19.009
Frank DeDominicis: and develop my own form of infotainment. I call it a way of having fun with teaching and teaching things that are immediately practical in someone's life.
149
00:18:19.160 --> 00:18:35.660
Frank DeDominicis: And to close on your question, I'll say this. I was so lucky when I was in high school because I met 2 innovative teachers through the School Board, the Philadelphia School Board, Norm Newberg, and Terry Borton, who invented, not, did not invent.
150
00:18:35.820 --> 00:18:42.029
Frank DeDominicis: but introduced the concept of affective education, of education, of the total person.
151
00:18:42.480 --> 00:19:06.320
Frank DeDominicis: So I was able to study in my college years through an interdisciplinary program that involved 3 disciplines, philosophy, psychology, and sociology. To study one subject for 3 h with 3 teachers. We studied poverty, and we studied institutional violence the next year, and was Norm Newberg, and Terry Borton, famous now in the world of affective education
152
00:19:06.620 --> 00:19:12.459
Frank DeDominicis: for allowing students to immerse themselves totally in the subject. Not just given book reports.
153
00:19:12.660 --> 00:19:22.979
Frank DeDominicis: So that's that's what started me in my career in training 40 years ago, wanting to provide the type of education that doesn't just give information.
154
00:19:23.220 --> 00:19:30.610
Frank DeDominicis: but creates a safe space for people to explore their own attitudes in, how they relate and to make those changes. And
155
00:19:30.940 --> 00:19:35.239
Frank DeDominicis: there was such a self-esteem reward from that type of work. I just could not stop.
156
00:19:36.260 --> 00:19:42.850
Mark Entrekin: Wow! You've been a pretty impressive life. I'm impressed. I know that I've been impressed since I've met you many years ago.
157
00:19:43.130 --> 00:19:49.110
Mark Entrekin: but you have a lot of things that you have built upon, and quite a foundation.
158
00:19:49.310 --> 00:19:51.249
Frank DeDominicis: That you have grown from.
159
00:19:51.950 --> 00:19:53.960
Mark Entrekin: Do you think it was your mother that
160
00:19:54.150 --> 00:19:58.140
Mark Entrekin: sparked that you think? What if there was something that was a spark?
161
00:19:58.340 --> 00:20:04.460
Mark Entrekin: How do you feel that you could have sparked that that initial passion that you had to help people?
162
00:20:05.550 --> 00:20:08.410
Mark Entrekin: Do you feel? Was it just an accumulation
163
00:20:08.730 --> 00:20:11.670
Mark Entrekin: of all the things that you talk about? Was there that one spark.
164
00:20:11.900 --> 00:20:20.380
Frank DeDominicis: That's a good question, absolutely. My mother has been a pivotal influence in my life. All my, all the years of her.
165
00:20:20.510 --> 00:20:23.220
Frank DeDominicis: her life, of our deep, deep friendship.
166
00:20:23.400 --> 00:20:24.740
Frank DeDominicis: Not just that
167
00:20:25.140 --> 00:20:31.780
Frank DeDominicis: conversation in my youth that I would be what I am today, but even supporting me recently
168
00:20:32.000 --> 00:20:34.869
Frank DeDominicis: in in my attitude about what I'm doing.
169
00:20:37.090 --> 00:20:39.990
Frank DeDominicis: To answer your question directly. No, I don't think
170
00:20:40.100 --> 00:20:47.289
Frank DeDominicis: there was influence, but I I think it was embedded in me. I don't know. It's just part of my nature. If I see something broken.
171
00:20:47.400 --> 00:21:06.599
Frank DeDominicis: I want to fix it, you know. If I visit your house, you know. Forgive me. I might straighten the picture on the wall, and the same thing with organizations, you know. I really, you know, I don't want to use the word hate. But I really despise the waste of human energy when you consider what a beautiful creation the individual is.
172
00:21:06.760 --> 00:21:26.499
Frank DeDominicis: and unfortunately, I think most of us are too self-centered to have a sincere curiosity into the depths of others. So I've always wanted to have meaningful conversations and really not want to engage in just, you know, babbling on the phone about the news, or or about other people. But my mind.
173
00:21:26.500 --> 00:21:26.920
Mark Entrekin: Exactly.
174
00:21:26.920 --> 00:21:33.929
Frank DeDominicis: Goes elsewhere, goes to the higher values of life. And what makes our relationships harmonious.
175
00:21:35.220 --> 00:21:39.049
Mark Entrekin: I'm so true with what you're saying, because there are a lot of people
176
00:21:39.460 --> 00:21:46.229
Mark Entrekin: that, as I mentioned earlier, that are in that culture before what they've learned.
177
00:21:46.470 --> 00:21:51.090
Mark Entrekin: And they're carrying that culture forward. They're carrying that learning forward.
178
00:21:51.300 --> 00:21:57.900
Mark Entrekin: And they're not relearning are improving that learning to realize that
179
00:21:58.050 --> 00:22:02.009
Mark Entrekin: there could be a better way, or what you're doing now.
180
00:22:02.210 --> 00:22:05.419
Frank DeDominicis: Could take you to that next level. Right?
181
00:22:05.950 --> 00:22:06.950
Frank DeDominicis: You're correct.
182
00:22:07.680 --> 00:22:12.350
Mark Entrekin: And that goes back to what you said earlier about lean is what we talked about when we were 1st brought up in this
183
00:22:12.600 --> 00:22:15.869
Mark Entrekin: 1st few slides that eliminating waste.
184
00:22:16.320 --> 00:22:17.629
Mark Entrekin: And like you're talking about that
185
00:22:18.000 --> 00:22:27.510
Mark Entrekin: process, you're talking about the waste that there's so much more we can build on and wasting time talking about. Sometimes all of our political
186
00:22:27.840 --> 00:22:37.849
Mark Entrekin: could be nonsense on TV by both parties, all affiliations. It's not just one, but some of that is just not taking us anywhere, is it.
187
00:22:38.800 --> 00:22:41.290
Frank DeDominicis: It's taken us someplace. It should not.
188
00:22:41.450 --> 00:22:47.590
Frank DeDominicis: And I'll reference something relative to the Wiley's disc research.
189
00:22:47.710 --> 00:22:54.190
Frank DeDominicis: which has been recent only in the past 5 years have we really delved deeply into the emotional posture
190
00:22:54.530 --> 00:22:55.890
Frank DeDominicis: people's styles?
191
00:22:56.110 --> 00:22:58.049
Frank DeDominicis: And here's what we have found.
192
00:22:58.330 --> 00:23:05.040
Frank DeDominicis: A study was done, and I'll provide the citation in the free ebook I'll give you. At the end of this
193
00:23:05.160 --> 00:23:08.049
Frank DeDominicis: a study was done with a group of
194
00:23:08.170 --> 00:23:28.629
Frank DeDominicis: 2 different groups that were politically separate Conservatives and not Conservatives, would have been interesting to have them in the same room. But but at any rate they were both asked to present an argument for why? They are absolutely right, and we certainly hear a lot of absolute moralism these days.
195
00:23:28.630 --> 00:23:29.489
Mark Entrekin: Don't we.
196
00:23:30.150 --> 00:23:43.380
Frank DeDominicis: They're absolutely right. And the other person's not only wrong, but they're the demons for undermining, and the same thing with the with the other group. They were given the same instruction. Explain why you're right and your opponent's wrong.
197
00:23:43.500 --> 00:23:51.070
Frank DeDominicis: And they did. And when they did, the frontal lobes lit up thinking, reasoning, thought, processing right.
198
00:23:51.190 --> 00:24:20.819
Frank DeDominicis: And then a very interesting exercise was given to them. They were asked, and if you've studied debate, you know empathy is an important part of understanding your arguing the point of view you disagree with, and that's exactly what they did. They had them explain why they were wrong. Why they, how could I possibly be wrong? You know my self identity is so wrapped up in self-righteousness, we seldom look at how much our ego drives us.
199
00:24:21.090 --> 00:24:28.999
Frank DeDominicis: and I'm to explain why the other person is right, and what they found out is that when I
200
00:24:29.726 --> 00:24:36.589
Frank DeDominicis: participate in the exercise had the opportunity to explain why my opponent was wrong
201
00:24:36.790 --> 00:24:40.369
Frank DeDominicis: and why that reinforced? Why, I'm right.
202
00:24:40.630 --> 00:24:52.379
Frank DeDominicis: An interesting thing happened. The frontal lobes were not as active. They were minimally active, but the area of the brain that registers emotions particularly the emotion of disgust
203
00:24:53.090 --> 00:24:54.930
Frank DeDominicis: registered, and all.
204
00:24:54.930 --> 00:24:55.270
Mark Entrekin: Isn't it.
205
00:24:55.270 --> 00:25:03.179
Frank DeDominicis: In that same area that's responsible for dispensing the interferons to feel good pleasure chemicals, oxytocin, and all that
206
00:25:03.660 --> 00:25:26.910
Frank DeDominicis: that pleasure center lit up. So is there a payback for us? Do we subconsciously enjoy? I'm going to suggest. Yes, I'm going to suggest that the reason we get hooked into a news headline, no matter what side you're on, because I believe every news headline is clickbait. It gives us a dopamine hit. Oh, yeah, great. Our enemies exposed, sued dead, whatever
207
00:25:26.910 --> 00:25:36.709
Frank DeDominicis: you know, it makes us feel like we're self-righteous. You know. We're disgusted with the enemy and good they're being sued, or something bad happened to him, and.
208
00:25:36.710 --> 00:25:37.900
Mark Entrekin: Something negative.
209
00:25:38.150 --> 00:25:42.810
Frank DeDominicis: Something negative. It doesn't have to be along party lines. It's just individuals.
210
00:25:43.050 --> 00:26:11.040
Frank DeDominicis: you know. Gossip, you know. Gossip. What about a destructive force in society yet it's accepted as as normal, because usually it's not in a constructive way I don't get together with Mark to edify. Oh, by the way, I want to say how great rich was in that talk. I don't take time to do that. Why not? We don't call her shrink to say I'm having a joyful day today, do we.
211
00:26:11.040 --> 00:26:12.416
Mark Entrekin: Well, the same thing.
212
00:26:13.100 --> 00:26:34.449
Frank DeDominicis: The same thing with the influence of the media on us. We are not aware that we can become neurochemically addicted to having excitable news headlines spark us because it gives us subconsciously, and we probably wouldn't admit this gives us a feeling of pleasure in being superior.
213
00:26:34.720 --> 00:26:36.949
Frank DeDominicis: or think we're superior.
214
00:26:37.570 --> 00:26:42.679
Mark Entrekin: And I like what you're saying, too, because, as you're saying, it's both being coaches, and I know for me as a coach.
215
00:26:43.310 --> 00:26:45.430
Mark Entrekin: People are coming to me to improve.
216
00:26:45.660 --> 00:26:49.849
Mark Entrekin: They see some ways that their things are not perfect.
217
00:26:50.250 --> 00:27:04.380
Mark Entrekin: but they can be improved. That part of the process like with you think you're on the cutting edge of effective education? Am I getting that right? Because that cutting edge takes it to that next level of improvement?
218
00:27:04.660 --> 00:27:05.490
Mark Entrekin: Is that right?
219
00:27:05.860 --> 00:27:10.210
Frank DeDominicis: Yes, we refer to as affective, impacting our feelings.
220
00:27:10.890 --> 00:27:11.720
Frank DeDominicis: Yes.
221
00:27:11.870 --> 00:27:12.370
Frank DeDominicis: Can you.
222
00:27:12.370 --> 00:27:13.900
Mark Entrekin: Tell us a bit more about that, if you don't mind.
223
00:27:17.280 --> 00:27:18.760
Frank DeDominicis: What do you want to know?
224
00:27:18.760 --> 00:27:36.569
Mark Entrekin: Well, if I'm talking affective other than effective, it's an affective feeling. It's an affective education, and how it's going to shape your kind of what you do. I think you talk about Norm Newberg and Terry Borden and that Parkway program. It's about the interdisciplinary
225
00:27:36.730 --> 00:27:41.970
Mark Entrekin: process of the teachers and societal subjects that are
226
00:27:42.970 --> 00:27:48.130
Mark Entrekin: building a new process. And like you're saying you've been in disk for so long.
227
00:27:48.250 --> 00:27:54.740
Mark Entrekin: But building that process for us to work with others so much better.
228
00:27:55.040 --> 00:28:00.879
Frank DeDominicis: Well, let me answer by saying, there's 2 parts to that. One is the content and delivery.
229
00:28:01.270 --> 00:28:26.119
Frank DeDominicis: and the second piece is the interpretation, the sensitivity of the teacher or trainer. I think one of the reasons I stayed with disc as a tool. I don't lean on it exclusively. It's a good tool, but I don't proselytize for it. It's not a clinical instrument that's predictable. It simply tells you your predominant tendencies in interactions with others.
230
00:28:26.260 --> 00:28:39.649
Frank DeDominicis: although that profile that you take this morning in the corporate boardroom might look completely different than the profile you would take of yourself at home with your lover or spouse in the evening. We are very fluid and flexible
231
00:28:39.900 --> 00:28:51.209
Frank DeDominicis: so, and with that I must mention 2 things that have been a little bit of p for me, and that's the tendency to call disc a personality tool or assessment. It's not.
232
00:28:51.600 --> 00:28:54.999
Frank DeDominicis: It's not a clinical instrument. It simply tells predominant
233
00:28:55.080 --> 00:29:14.750
Frank DeDominicis: tendencies, and also your profile could change next week if you've gone through some significant emotional event. So I caution people about labeling themselves a blue, a 9, A. D. Or whatever. It's just a helpful way of beginning the conversation.
234
00:29:14.810 --> 00:29:30.490
Frank DeDominicis: So you can have a non-threatening dialogue about behavior, particularly in the corporate environment where we don't know. I shouldn't say don't know. But generally people don't know how to approach other people, to speak in a way
235
00:29:30.820 --> 00:29:37.220
Frank DeDominicis: that allows other people to hear what you have to say. I'm sure Mark knows what I'm talking about.
236
00:29:38.630 --> 00:29:43.640
Mark Entrekin: And to touch on that. And as we joked earlier, and I have a smile on my face, but I'm going to challenge you.
237
00:29:43.730 --> 00:29:44.370
Frank DeDominicis: Yes.
238
00:29:44.740 --> 00:29:49.619
Mark Entrekin: As you were talking earlier about one test at work.
239
00:29:50.160 --> 00:29:56.179
Mark Entrekin: a different test on the personal side. Why do we separate those feelings
240
00:29:56.420 --> 00:29:59.079
Mark Entrekin: so much, because, as I work with
241
00:29:59.360 --> 00:30:10.240
Mark Entrekin: different ideas, different concepts, agile, lean, 2 of them. How they do actually connect personally and professionally.
242
00:30:10.750 --> 00:30:12.409
Mark Entrekin: Can you tell me, how would you feel about that.
243
00:30:13.090 --> 00:30:30.700
Frank DeDominicis: Yes, in the middle days of disk, in the eighties and nineties we would ask people to do their input based on how they see themselves at work or at home, so we would get 2 different profiles, and we would be able to see what went up and down a little bit.
244
00:30:31.350 --> 00:30:48.480
Frank DeDominicis: Nowadays we find that people are pretty much the same person in most environments with some changes. So we don't lean on that as much anymore. But we can tell the differences. For example, you might need to be
245
00:30:48.590 --> 00:31:14.979
Frank DeDominicis: uncomfortably assertive. Maybe you're a high Ca high critical type that's low, verbal, a thoughtful listener who doesn't like to speak feels nervous with speaking, even in social situations, but at work. You're called upon to give a report or to provide direction and discipline. So you must have enforced behavior. You must pull up your assertiveness, or what we call dominance, assertive aggressiveness. In order to act differently.
246
00:31:15.010 --> 00:31:28.830
Frank DeDominicis: It's not as if you're a different person or you're an actor. The environment dictates the change. And the same thing with the example I used in the evening. Perhaps you're with someone you love as a good example.
247
00:31:29.010 --> 00:31:42.240
Frank DeDominicis: and your dominance drops completely, and you're you're totally passive. Oh, I don't care. Where do you want to go. What do you want to order? I don't care, and you're totally compliant.
248
00:31:42.770 --> 00:31:49.239
Frank DeDominicis: So so I encourage people not to label themselves DISC. But think of these 4 elements as
249
00:31:49.620 --> 00:31:54.779
Frank DeDominicis: like, just imagine a container with 4 different oils that mix. That's how complex it is.
250
00:31:55.130 --> 00:31:56.420
Frank DeDominicis: I am.
251
00:31:56.620 --> 00:32:03.700
Frank DeDominicis: You can probably tell I am what they refer to as a high eye, high empathy. I connect with people. I'm a people magnet.
252
00:32:03.880 --> 00:32:16.919
Frank DeDominicis: and I have a trail Md. Which most people don't see because I hide it, but I have a hammer that I could pull up if I if I need to lay down the wall or or be serious. You know very, very serious about something.
253
00:32:17.030 --> 00:32:40.300
Frank DeDominicis: but most people don't see me in that pro in either one of those styles. They see me as an S. Someone who's very calm and secure, because that's my enforced behavior. I like to make room for other people, not just their physical presence, but their state of consciousness and not to dominate with changing the subject, but really enter into the mind space that they're in when they're talking about someone
254
00:32:40.730 --> 00:32:54.190
Frank DeDominicis: you talked about conflict and differences. I learned a lot about how to deal with, or how to connect with others who have a totally totally opposite point of view.
255
00:32:54.650 --> 00:32:57.549
Frank DeDominicis: I read a book by Monica Guzman.
256
00:32:58.310 --> 00:33:04.289
Frank DeDominicis: The name of the book is here it comes. I never thought of it that way.
257
00:33:04.420 --> 00:33:11.429
Frank DeDominicis: She's a young journalist who had absolutely opposite political opinions as her mother and father, who she lived with.
258
00:33:11.620 --> 00:33:23.089
Frank DeDominicis: and she had long experience in interviewing people and training herself to be a neutral interviewer, and what she learned is over time. And I've developed this, too. I've developed a sincere curiosity
259
00:33:23.380 --> 00:33:33.869
Frank DeDominicis: about the other reason. I talked to a friend who's totally polar opposite to me. And instead of thinking, how in the world could you think that way?
260
00:33:34.020 --> 00:33:52.409
Frank DeDominicis: I had a sincere curiosity about his thinking? And I asked instead, How did you come to that conclusion? What made you think that way, and what it did to summarize what it did is it didn't change the relationship in that moment, but in the next meeting there was much less tension with us.
261
00:33:54.600 --> 00:33:59.869
Mark Entrekin: That's excellent. And as you mentioned that, that's something that I show some people, but
262
00:34:00.110 --> 00:34:04.499
Mark Entrekin: that ability to ask that question and smile
263
00:34:05.310 --> 00:34:13.869
Mark Entrekin: is so beneficial that I have 3 pictures here on my wall, and they say, always respond with the question. First, st
264
00:34:14.199 --> 00:34:19.319
Mark Entrekin: as you smile, it's got a picture of the question. Mark a picture of a guy doing his thumbs up.
265
00:34:19.590 --> 00:34:25.760
Mark Entrekin: That's what I always try to think about. Do I always do it? No, I don't. I try.
266
00:34:25.969 --> 00:34:34.950
Mark Entrekin: but I always joke about trying as a percentage how far along in that path are you? And some days I'm way ahead. Some days it's still a struggle.
267
00:34:35.199 --> 00:34:37.430
Mark Entrekin: because, like you're saying earlier, Frank.
268
00:34:38.080 --> 00:34:44.860
Mark Entrekin: to take back to when we take the test, whether it be a disc test or any of these other Myers-briggs or any of these other tests.
269
00:34:45.060 --> 00:34:47.800
Mark Entrekin: The mood that we are in
270
00:34:48.090 --> 00:34:54.230
Mark Entrekin: when we take that test, that exam answer questions, talk to someone else.
271
00:34:54.480 --> 00:34:58.679
Mark Entrekin: It's most likely going to be driven.
272
00:34:58.900 --> 00:35:01.530
Mark Entrekin: But what has happened to us in the last
273
00:35:01.720 --> 00:35:05.129
Mark Entrekin: 2, 4, 6, 8, maybe 24 h.
274
00:35:05.820 --> 00:35:10.520
Mark Entrekin: So that's going to impact us with our answers.
275
00:35:10.730 --> 00:35:17.000
Mark Entrekin: The more we think about as you just did that question you're talking about to be able to smile
276
00:35:17.300 --> 00:35:20.410
Mark Entrekin: and ask that question back anytime.
277
00:35:21.900 --> 00:35:24.050
Mark Entrekin: We're in one of those moods.
278
00:35:24.410 --> 00:35:25.690
Mark Entrekin: Our modes.
279
00:35:25.950 --> 00:35:31.779
Mark Entrekin: It kind of helps us connect better with whoever it is. We're talking with correct.
280
00:35:32.240 --> 00:35:47.110
Frank DeDominicis: That's correct, absolutely. Whenever I gave someone a disc profile to do. Whether it was recently or 40 years ago, I was, would always give instructions. Do not do this. If you're coming from or going to anything stressful.
281
00:35:47.700 --> 00:35:57.440
Frank DeDominicis: do not allow any interruptions and do whatever you need to do to have a singular focus on this short little input exercise which takes 10 min
282
00:35:57.680 --> 00:36:15.319
Frank DeDominicis: because right? We are influenced by others around us. That reminds me of another test that was done with 2 groups. Or, pardon me, yes, 2 groups, and forgive me for forgetting the citation, but involved a dental office and a radio program
283
00:36:15.620 --> 00:36:21.549
Frank DeDominicis: and the radio program in that one group that was waiting in the dental office listened to
284
00:36:21.750 --> 00:36:28.739
Frank DeDominicis: was about a terrible accident that happened. A bus over a cliff, and people dying.
285
00:36:29.200 --> 00:36:29.640
Mark Entrekin: Oh!
286
00:36:29.730 --> 00:36:35.629
Frank DeDominicis: And then the second group. This was phony. It was just a test of reaction. Their emotion, reaction.
287
00:36:36.020 --> 00:36:37.491
Mark Entrekin: Got mine right there.
288
00:36:37.860 --> 00:36:46.479
Frank DeDominicis: Another one came up, and instead it gave news of some horrible, violent situation in which there is a perpetrator and victims.
289
00:36:46.710 --> 00:36:52.080
Frank DeDominicis: and then the people were put into a room to discuss together
290
00:36:52.390 --> 00:37:00.700
Frank DeDominicis: an issue around the meeting, and they thought they were there to talk about the dental practice, and and they were given.
291
00:37:01.230 --> 00:37:08.130
Frank DeDominicis: How should I say fluffy questions just to make conversation, and what the observers noticed
292
00:37:08.260 --> 00:37:13.170
Frank DeDominicis: is those people who listen to the bad news about
293
00:37:13.840 --> 00:37:31.569
Frank DeDominicis: sad news about some accident that happened had a deeper connection and empathy with others in the room, and those who had listened to the bad news of some evil crime that had happened were more distant and lacked eye contact and even involvement. Isn't that interesting?
294
00:37:32.070 --> 00:37:39.109
Mark Entrekin: Is interesting, and I think more of us, if not, every one of us needs to go through that
295
00:37:40.560 --> 00:37:44.049
Mark Entrekin: test. That concept, even
296
00:37:44.290 --> 00:37:51.080
Mark Entrekin: in high school or college. I think that's something we all need to be introduced to, and I'm
297
00:37:51.330 --> 00:37:53.359
Mark Entrekin: just impressed with all of your
298
00:37:53.510 --> 00:37:59.200
Mark Entrekin: 4 decades of what you've done and been involved with that you can see those.
299
00:37:59.450 --> 00:38:05.209
Mark Entrekin: and then truly bring those to life on your your day-to-day efforts.
300
00:38:05.520 --> 00:38:10.320
Mark Entrekin: And if I can touch just a bit further with that, since you have been doing this for
301
00:38:10.460 --> 00:38:17.040
Mark Entrekin: 40 plus years, can you think of some things that are more different
302
00:38:17.470 --> 00:38:23.860
Mark Entrekin: today? Are you some, you said, some of them at the testing, but as far as working with the people themselves, your coaching and skills development.
303
00:38:23.860 --> 00:38:24.560
Frank DeDominicis: Yes.
304
00:38:24.560 --> 00:38:30.379
Mark Entrekin: What do you see challenging the leaders more? Or do you see something, anything, some things
305
00:38:30.540 --> 00:38:32.870
Mark Entrekin: challenging leaders more today?
306
00:38:33.240 --> 00:38:37.860
Mark Entrekin: Then they did 1020, 30, even 40 plus years ago.
307
00:38:38.190 --> 00:38:48.550
Frank DeDominicis: Oh, my yeah, yes, yes, of course, there's 2 parts to your answer. One is the format of training, and 2 is the content of
308
00:38:49.900 --> 00:38:52.460
Frank DeDominicis: problems that leadership faces today.
309
00:38:53.350 --> 00:38:59.100
Frank DeDominicis: So I'll speak on content 1st and and then the more experiential side of the question.
310
00:38:59.820 --> 00:39:05.629
Frank DeDominicis: Back in the day, as I said. We used to do intensives all day. Seminars or retreats
311
00:39:06.020 --> 00:39:06.706
Frank DeDominicis: we bring
312
00:39:07.250 --> 00:39:15.660
Frank DeDominicis: United way up to Gold Lake Ranch above Boulder, and we'd have a fun weekend retreat and have studies, or I'd bring people to a resort
313
00:39:15.780 --> 00:39:20.839
Frank DeDominicis: up in Estes Park and have on the job vacations with the University of Denver Staff.
314
00:39:21.030 --> 00:39:31.579
Frank DeDominicis: and and that was good that was fulfilling. We can get a lot done in one day, and then that that also broke down into workshops. This is pre-internet, mind you.
315
00:39:31.890 --> 00:39:36.150
Frank DeDominicis: So the work involved content and surveys and
316
00:39:36.300 --> 00:40:05.790
Frank DeDominicis: and manual registrations. Then came the Internet. And with the Internet, the major change in delivering services is online self-paced learning programs. So anyone who's a good teacher is probably looking at developing residual development of their business by making an online course or having whatever content they're developing mature into content that could be put into that format.
317
00:40:06.250 --> 00:40:18.260
Frank DeDominicis: The most recent changes in tendencies trends rather in the training industry is that, especially with the economic situation. Corporations
318
00:40:18.500 --> 00:40:28.010
Frank DeDominicis: need to pinch their pennies. They can't afford to write a big, fat check for you to come in and do your long, big, intensive program. Maybe they can.
319
00:40:28.140 --> 00:40:37.470
Frank DeDominicis: but the preference is for consultants. Trainers like us to deal with immediate real-time problems right now.
320
00:40:37.580 --> 00:40:41.280
Frank DeDominicis: and to involve and engage the people directly
321
00:40:41.430 --> 00:40:48.699
Frank DeDominicis: and to develop training that's wrapped around an immediate problem. Perhaps it's attrition. Perhaps it's conflict.
322
00:40:49.650 --> 00:41:00.819
Frank DeDominicis: That's the new training I'm adapting along with Wiley and other disc trainers to that format, so that we can empower in-house trainers not replace them.
323
00:41:01.200 --> 00:41:02.140
Frank DeDominicis: The train, the trainer.
324
00:41:02.140 --> 00:41:03.080
Mark Entrekin: Oh, I like that.
325
00:41:03.290 --> 00:41:07.930
Frank DeDominicis: The train. The trainer concept came about in the early stages that 1st phase
326
00:41:08.030 --> 00:41:11.880
Frank DeDominicis: and it developed into affiliate programs in the second phase.
327
00:41:12.030 --> 00:41:23.979
Frank DeDominicis: But now it's more, how can I make myself? Not indispensable, but valuable only when the in-house trainer really really needs me, and to minimize that expense?
328
00:41:24.760 --> 00:41:48.840
Frank DeDominicis: Many trainers are not getting in sync with this new paradigm shift. It's fun to go in and deliver your entire process, your book, your delivery, and that still is out there. But what's really necessary, particularly given, how conflict has so saturated our work environments, it's more important to be able to come together
329
00:41:48.970 --> 00:41:56.819
Frank DeDominicis: and solve that the way we do that the way I do that is through an online platform called Catalyst.
330
00:41:56.910 --> 00:42:26.479
Frank DeDominicis: which helps the disc person, the person who's taking the profile in the corporation to go in and do a comparison. I could go in and look up my fellow workers. Profile, get a printout of the same disc profile with our dots in different places, and in addition to that, I can also get a readout on my degree of resistance to changing my behavior to more acceptable behavior.
331
00:42:26.620 --> 00:42:31.800
Frank DeDominicis: which was hard for me to read@firstst Given my profile.
332
00:42:33.590 --> 00:42:38.303
Frank DeDominicis: We all we all we all can benefit from a little bit of humility,
333
00:42:38.640 --> 00:42:39.840
Mark Entrekin: I agree.
334
00:42:40.100 --> 00:42:52.419
Frank DeDominicis: What else can I tell you about that? Oh, you can also do a blind. This has been around since the paper disk back in the eighties. You could do a blind profile. Salespeople used to use it that way.
335
00:42:52.610 --> 00:43:10.280
Frank DeDominicis: They would go into the say, a car salesman's meeting with a couple, and they'd go into the next room. And now you could go into the system and plug in what you think is their profile. It's a quick and dirty profile, and it'll give you a comparison, and it'll actually tell you how to speak to the people, how not to.
336
00:43:10.280 --> 00:43:11.140
Mark Entrekin: Wow!
337
00:43:11.140 --> 00:43:11.720
Frank DeDominicis: Bull.
338
00:43:12.160 --> 00:43:20.190
Frank DeDominicis: This tool has also been used. Over half a million of the. There's over 70 million profiles have been used to date over a million a year are used.
339
00:43:20.390 --> 00:43:22.070
Frank DeDominicis: and it's over half a million.
340
00:43:22.270 --> 00:43:22.890
Mark Entrekin: Jimmy.
341
00:43:22.890 --> 00:43:25.619
Frank DeDominicis: Have been used in premarital counseling.
342
00:43:25.800 --> 00:43:37.849
Frank DeDominicis: so that the counselor could tell A and B. Well, you are a driver, and you move too fast for this person who's quiet and reflective and quiet and reflective person.
343
00:43:37.990 --> 00:43:49.499
Frank DeDominicis: Your partner can't read your mind. You need to speak up, even if it's uncomfortable. We need to teach you some segues for how to break the ice and say I'm nervous. I don't want to talk about this, but I must.
344
00:43:49.620 --> 00:44:01.919
Frank DeDominicis: and and provide training. And last of all, I've also offered one-on-one training with all the historical patterns, with local therapists and counselors. I have a
345
00:44:02.170 --> 00:44:12.159
Frank DeDominicis: a friend who's an elder guardian, and I've been able over course of a year to go through each of the 12 profiles and to help make him a better counselor.
346
00:44:12.430 --> 00:44:18.870
Frank DeDominicis: So that's the way the way we address the conflict.
347
00:44:18.980 --> 00:44:24.190
Frank DeDominicis: the piece of the profile. And and you're right. It has to do with the environment and the interpretation.
348
00:44:25.320 --> 00:44:32.749
Mark Entrekin: It does. And I liked what you just said about reading minds. How many of us think the other person knows everything that we know.
349
00:44:33.010 --> 00:44:39.640
Mark Entrekin: and we speak to them as if they have read our mind and know so much more than they.
350
00:44:39.750 --> 00:44:48.810
Mark Entrekin: Actually. No, that brings a brings a huge challenge into collaboration and communication, right.
351
00:44:49.180 --> 00:44:51.689
Frank DeDominicis: It's a common challenge. We're.
352
00:44:51.690 --> 00:44:52.329
Mark Entrekin: So it is coming.
353
00:44:52.400 --> 00:44:56.909
Frank DeDominicis: Our thinking is so used to making assumptions that we translate as facts.
354
00:44:57.460 --> 00:45:09.080
Frank DeDominicis: So I make an observation about an exchange I have with someone, and that interpretation is only my assumption that's passed through my bias filters. It's not.
355
00:45:09.440 --> 00:45:32.449
Frank DeDominicis: It's not an absolute fact. Memory is selective. We we interpret and store. I remember having an argument, and in my file my complaint file up there. I can remember the 4 or 5 major points for why, I could debate, and win and beat that other person. But what sense is it for me to waste my mental time on that mental rehearsing and rehearsing argument
356
00:45:32.650 --> 00:45:41.400
Frank DeDominicis: when I really need to. As the productive conflict philosophy teaches, learn how to adjust my own 1st thought.
357
00:45:41.620 --> 00:45:51.350
Frank DeDominicis: The productive conflict I teach on is based on cognitive behavioral therapy that is checking our impulsive, immediate self-talk.
358
00:45:52.570 --> 00:46:00.130
Frank DeDominicis: reframing that self-talk again. This is enforced behavior, something that might make you feel like you're acting or phony.
359
00:46:00.280 --> 00:46:07.919
Frank DeDominicis: But it's a way of accepting an attitude that will make you better received by the other person, even if they're angry with you.
360
00:46:10.510 --> 00:46:13.630
Frank DeDominicis: That's a very good point, and some of the things you were talking about there.
361
00:46:13.750 --> 00:46:16.290
Mark Entrekin: Makes me think of when people say
362
00:46:16.430 --> 00:46:19.400
Mark Entrekin: make certain comments when they say, you know.
363
00:46:19.660 --> 00:46:24.719
Mark Entrekin: you know. No, if I knew I wouldn't come to you to start with.
364
00:46:24.840 --> 00:46:47.499
Frank DeDominicis: Once again our assumptive mind. We all took assertiveness 101, 40 years ago, but we've forgotten the feedback loop we're supposed to check in and say, Is this what you're saying? Here's what my understanding of your words. But instead, once again, most of us don't practice listening. Listening is simply what we do while we're waiting for our turn to talk.
365
00:46:48.250 --> 00:46:53.200
Mark Entrekin: That's so true. I wish I could. I need to put that on my wall, too, because that's
366
00:46:53.620 --> 00:46:54.440
Mark Entrekin: that's 1 of the things
367
00:46:54.440 --> 00:46:58.759
Mark Entrekin: we do. We are just waiting for our next turn to be able to input, something, give something, some input
368
00:46:59.040 --> 00:47:02.550
Mark Entrekin: into that process. And as you're just mentioning
369
00:47:02.840 --> 00:47:06.820
Mark Entrekin: so much of what we hear. Excuse me, is rumors.
370
00:47:07.290 --> 00:47:11.619
Mark Entrekin: and that's what we're basing a lot of what we're talking about.
371
00:47:11.970 --> 00:47:16.050
Mark Entrekin: And the end result is sometimes disastrous.
372
00:47:16.230 --> 00:47:22.949
Mark Entrekin: because we're working on the rumors based on what we heard. We have no facts. There's no reality to it.
373
00:47:23.690 --> 00:47:32.329
Mark Entrekin: If we hear it, and especially if we say it, it becomes fact in our mind, in her mind.
374
00:47:33.480 --> 00:47:34.210
Frank DeDominicis: True.
375
00:47:34.250 --> 00:47:40.469
Mark Entrekin: If I can touch on that just a little bit, and we're running down here to about about 13 min up. We still have some time
376
00:47:40.960 --> 00:47:43.839
Mark Entrekin: again, very impressed with your background.
377
00:47:44.060 --> 00:47:48.980
Mark Entrekin: And, as you say, you're a global goodwill Ambassador.
378
00:47:49.250 --> 00:47:51.029
Mark Entrekin: That is impressive.
379
00:47:51.200 --> 00:48:01.039
Mark Entrekin: Now, how do you work? How do you handle that with your business expertise. And you're working with the global goodwill and good causes.
380
00:48:01.410 --> 00:48:04.109
Mark Entrekin: How can you help us
381
00:48:07.450 --> 00:48:12.240
Mark Entrekin: combine and integrate some of those types of
382
00:48:12.370 --> 00:48:18.580
Mark Entrekin: what would be thought processes that you utilize to absolutely create solutions.
383
00:48:18.960 --> 00:48:20.120
Frank DeDominicis: Absolutely.
384
00:48:20.360 --> 00:48:30.839
Frank DeDominicis: I previously walled those 2 worlds. I believe a good deed done is best known only by God and yourself. I didn't want to brag about
385
00:48:31.200 --> 00:48:32.280
Frank DeDominicis: anything.
386
00:48:32.440 --> 00:48:52.080
Frank DeDominicis: but I received recognition in 2017 for helping to develop a nonprofit that would rejoin broken families. We agreed we wouldn't get into anything that was heavy, legally or psychologically. But if families were separated only because of a little bit of money or something, we would
387
00:48:52.250 --> 00:48:53.490
Frank DeDominicis: great grands.
388
00:48:53.590 --> 00:49:10.160
Frank DeDominicis: This was initiated by the Dadinga tribe that came from Kakuma refugee camp in Kenya, and we began with the Kenya refugees, the migrants and immigrants. We are still active today it's called the Alale Hill Organization.
389
00:49:10.350 --> 00:49:12.040
Mark Entrekin: Okay, we're.
390
00:49:12.780 --> 00:49:33.160
Frank DeDominicis: How should I say this? We're bypassing red tape and going direct to direct services. So the majority of the monies that come in go directly to bump in the road grants and larger grants for immigrants who are making cultural adjustment here. I serve as an advisor for that team.
391
00:49:33.250 --> 00:49:45.300
Frank DeDominicis: and I apply the same principles of organization effectiveness with that group as I do with a for-profit organization. The difference is that
392
00:49:45.710 --> 00:49:53.159
Frank DeDominicis: for-profit conversation corporations often want me to help simply to multiply the bottom line numbers
393
00:49:53.490 --> 00:49:59.450
Frank DeDominicis: the the overall, the faucets of the organization, the various number ratios that we measure.
394
00:49:59.620 --> 00:50:03.719
Frank DeDominicis: which I'm good at. I can do that very dispassionately.
395
00:50:03.840 --> 00:50:11.630
Frank DeDominicis: but applying myself to the nonprofit environment and helping good causes fulfills me personally of
396
00:50:11.740 --> 00:50:38.839
Frank DeDominicis: you know I'm paid with love real love. And, as you were saying about the influence of environment, when I leave that role as global Goodwill Ambassador, and put on my commercial hat, I still have that warm feeling that I'm here to serve this other person, and to earn the respect and to earn their confidence in the ability to make changes that probably were
397
00:50:39.030 --> 00:50:41.480
Frank DeDominicis: probably unimaginable before.
398
00:50:43.820 --> 00:50:48.069
Mark Entrekin: Sounds like you are touching on a lot of things where you learn
399
00:50:48.740 --> 00:50:51.269
Mark Entrekin: how to teach things to me.
400
00:50:51.410 --> 00:50:56.099
Mark Entrekin: Many, many years ago, when they were possibly in their infancy.
401
00:50:56.340 --> 00:51:02.519
Mark Entrekin: Now over the last again, 1020, 30, 40, plus years. You have seen them
402
00:51:02.930 --> 00:51:05.829
Mark Entrekin: improve within themselves a lot.
403
00:51:06.300 --> 00:51:11.519
Mark Entrekin: So you've possibly grown with it, and part of that growth.
404
00:51:12.550 --> 00:51:15.649
Frank DeDominicis: And see how we can better use things today that.
405
00:51:16.390 --> 00:51:20.280
Mark Entrekin: Not on purpose. But do you think, maybe
406
00:51:20.660 --> 00:51:23.530
Mark Entrekin: unknowingly mistaught a few years back.
407
00:51:26.050 --> 00:51:28.450
Frank DeDominicis: Hmm! That's a good question.
408
00:51:31.760 --> 00:51:37.830
Frank DeDominicis: I constantly look at the larger picture, the societal influences on individual behavior.
409
00:51:38.490 --> 00:51:44.560
Frank DeDominicis: and I and I see how, generally speaking, society tends to
410
00:51:44.830 --> 00:51:49.339
Frank DeDominicis: and polls bear this out. We tend to worry about and discuss similar things.
411
00:51:49.640 --> 00:51:54.209
Frank DeDominicis: We're upset about A, B and C, for example, that might change. But generally
412
00:51:54.470 --> 00:51:57.512
Frank DeDominicis: that's the same. I I think the answer is,
413
00:51:58.650 --> 00:52:09.689
Frank DeDominicis: we're not aware of how reflexive we are, how we are responding to the environment rather than taking control of our own attitude over our reaction to the environment.
414
00:52:09.900 --> 00:52:18.009
Frank DeDominicis: I'm not going to turn on the news tonight and get sick to my stomach before I go to bed, because everyone's fighting. I'm not going to do that.
415
00:52:18.340 --> 00:52:28.899
Frank DeDominicis: You know. I'm going to do something that involves human contact with others, whether it's a meditation on someone I love or a letter. Remember letters. I actually write letters to friends
416
00:52:29.310 --> 00:52:39.030
Frank DeDominicis: I learned in the early part of my career. Yeah, it shocks the heck out of people when they get a written letter, and it's a thoughtful letter. How archaic!
417
00:52:39.340 --> 00:52:44.940
Frank DeDominicis: But I remember a study that was done again. I learned this early in my career, and it benefited me much.
418
00:52:45.060 --> 00:52:58.879
Frank DeDominicis: A study was done, and again, I'm not going to have the citation at hand. But a study was done that basically said that the 1st 4 interactions we have in the day sets our attitude sets our mood for the day in all our relationships.
419
00:52:59.280 --> 00:53:10.190
Frank DeDominicis: Even if you're solo, it could be the bus driver. It could be the retail clerk at the Starbucks. It could be a stranger on the street, or someone waiting at the bus. Stop with you.
420
00:53:10.910 --> 00:53:15.180
Mark Entrekin: Could it be the dream? Sorry to interrupt you here, but could it be the dream that we just had before we woke up that morning?
421
00:53:15.240 --> 00:53:15.940
Frank DeDominicis: Yes, yes.
422
00:53:15.940 --> 00:53:19.519
Mark Entrekin: And then how we woke up next to our our spouse, and.
423
00:53:19.520 --> 00:53:19.870
Frank DeDominicis: Yeah.
424
00:53:19.870 --> 00:53:21.489
Mark Entrekin: See our children, or.
425
00:53:21.490 --> 00:53:24.600
Frank DeDominicis: Yes, yes, love, love, love. Yeah, exactly.
426
00:53:24.850 --> 00:53:38.029
Frank DeDominicis: Exactly. So. So I would say to people, be aware of this, and especially if you're someone who's solo or not so socially active, carefully choose the 1st few conversations you have in the day.
427
00:53:38.710 --> 00:53:47.619
Frank DeDominicis: Do that. There are days when I don't, where I'm not obligated to meet or talk with people. I can have a mouth faster today, but I make a point of calling up
428
00:53:47.800 --> 00:53:53.309
Frank DeDominicis: others who I want to give support to, or show some interest in.
429
00:53:53.450 --> 00:53:59.940
Frank DeDominicis: or to get some feedback from, and simply a few social minutes, and it tunes my attitude for the day.
430
00:54:00.980 --> 00:54:10.540
Mark Entrekin: That's beautiful. That's an awesome way to think about that, because, as you mentioned, if we tune a guitar or tune a musical instrument, you can tune your day.
431
00:54:10.860 --> 00:54:17.930
Mark Entrekin: so it's playing the sound. It's rehearsing the sound that you want to hear for the rest of your morning
432
00:54:18.410 --> 00:54:28.039
Mark Entrekin: afternoon, or the whole day tuned to your perceptions. It works so well, Frank, thank you so much. We have about 5 over 5 min left.
433
00:54:28.250 --> 00:54:36.960
Mark Entrekin: Let me go quickly over a disk, URL, that you sent me. I just put it into the chat. Can you tell me a little bit about what this URL will help
434
00:54:37.370 --> 00:54:38.460
Mark Entrekin: us 2.
435
00:54:38.550 --> 00:54:40.080
Frank DeDominicis: Is that a is that a user.
436
00:54:40.080 --> 00:54:44.719
Mark Entrekin: It's your disc, the one you send me on disk. It is a Youtube. Yes.
437
00:54:45.150 --> 00:54:52.440
Frank DeDominicis: Oh, that! That's an introductory description of of the definition of disk. So for those who are brand new to disk.
438
00:54:52.620 --> 00:54:55.310
Frank DeDominicis: it'll give a basic definition.
439
00:54:55.830 --> 00:55:09.620
Frank DeDominicis: I will, in closing, since we only have a few minutes, tell you something that will be helpful in terms of minimizing tension in relationships. And you don't have to be an expert at this, or even take this to know this.
440
00:55:10.240 --> 00:55:14.460
Frank DeDominicis: This D stands for dominance, assertive aggressiveness.
441
00:55:14.660 --> 00:55:19.700
Frank DeDominicis: Those people tend to be short tempered. They deal with a lot more anger. They tend to have
442
00:55:20.520 --> 00:55:32.709
Frank DeDominicis: different skills. Their people skills are not their primary skills, but they have the ability to bust through walls and impossibilities and to move on magic hunches. You need those kind of people.
443
00:55:32.890 --> 00:55:36.449
Frank DeDominicis: but they can come across as being insensitive to others.
444
00:55:36.550 --> 00:55:45.660
Frank DeDominicis: If you want to connect better with someone who has this behavior, predominant behavior. First, st observe their behavior.
445
00:55:45.860 --> 00:55:56.839
Frank DeDominicis: If they're fast, aggressive, talkative, and they're obviously dominant types, their greatest fear is the fear of being taken advantage of.
446
00:55:57.710 --> 00:56:06.070
Frank DeDominicis: If you remember one thing from today, remember that. And if you could find a way in the dialogue to help them, and it might not be
447
00:56:06.510 --> 00:56:16.550
Frank DeDominicis: a conflict point. It may be them wanting to dominate the conversation. You might let go of the rope and let the dominant, dominant person run. They'll take that as respect
448
00:56:16.900 --> 00:56:25.449
Frank DeDominicis: the high. I. They're all about people empathy, so their greatest fear is fear of loss of approval or affection.
449
00:56:26.120 --> 00:56:28.649
Frank DeDominicis: So if you have a conflict with them.
450
00:56:28.840 --> 00:56:34.010
Frank DeDominicis: don't reject them. Fight the problem, not the person. Don't reject them.
451
00:56:34.230 --> 00:56:34.950
Mark Entrekin: Said.
452
00:56:35.380 --> 00:56:39.669
Frank DeDominicis: If you find the S that stands for steadiness.
453
00:56:39.830 --> 00:56:45.589
Frank DeDominicis: and that's someone who likes calmness. Policy. Family keeps everything balanced.
454
00:56:46.030 --> 00:57:05.050
Frank DeDominicis: so don't. Their greatest fear of is fear of change. Don't tell them you've got some new, innovative, dynamic, exciting idea. Tell them you're going to take them from A peacefully to B calmly to C to D, and you're going to walk them through a process that results in this big dynamic change.
455
00:57:05.520 --> 00:57:12.530
Frank DeDominicis: And then, last of all, the C, the complaint type. These are sometimes the hardest to read, because
456
00:57:12.650 --> 00:57:35.130
Frank DeDominicis: this behavior is not indicative of the style. Sometimes people fall into this pattern where they just want to listen. They're the new boy at the party or conference, and they just want to absorb. So you might misread and think this person's a high C when it's just high C behavior. Like, I said earlier, anyone could exhibit any of these behaviors. Their greatest fear
457
00:57:35.480 --> 00:57:38.489
Frank DeDominicis: is fear of loss of accuracy.
458
00:57:39.360 --> 00:57:59.229
Frank DeDominicis: They're the scientists, they're the engineers, they're the chemists. They're the ones who are going to ask the annoying, nitpicking 1 million little questions about the project. But bear with them. They're not antagonistic. They just need that for their security. If you learn to recognize these 4 fears, the fear of being taken advantage of.
459
00:57:59.690 --> 00:58:02.379
Frank DeDominicis: the fear of loss, of approval and affection.
460
00:58:02.560 --> 00:58:15.709
Frank DeDominicis: the fear of loss, of security, and the fear of loss, of accuracy, and learn just these 4 tips. You'll move forward in having greater connection, intimacy, trust, and connection with others.
461
00:58:16.330 --> 00:58:41.049
Mark Entrekin: I like that, Frank. I think that's something that I've taken it before, but it's been decades ago. I need to take it again. I will review your website that URL, you sent and update myself on those I also just put out and thank you very much. Your free Pdf on productive conflict that's in the chat also. We only have about a minute left. But could you go ahead and fill us in quickly on what that tells us?
462
00:58:42.010 --> 00:58:50.600
Frank DeDominicis: That ebook will give you the background on productive conflict. It'll give you insights on how the entire process works. That's as much as I
463
00:58:50.760 --> 00:58:56.699
Frank DeDominicis: tell you, for now, if you want more information, contact me directly, and I'll give you appropriate links.
464
00:58:56.820 --> 00:59:19.909
Frank DeDominicis: Last of all, if there's strong enough interest with this group simply contact me to get on my advanced notification list, and soon I will schedule a disproductive conflict preview for free what my competitors would charge. But I'll spoil you and give you a presentation, and even provide a free mini disc infographic of your profile.
465
00:59:21.240 --> 00:59:28.410
Mark Entrekin: That is excellent, Frank. Thank you so much. I'm going to try to walk over here and grab your
466
00:59:29.200 --> 00:59:31.679
Mark Entrekin: if I can. Here, I'm not gonna be able to grab it.
467
00:59:33.210 --> 00:59:35.369
Mark Entrekin: Maybe I did hold on a second. I did.
468
00:59:35.580 --> 00:59:42.170
Mark Entrekin: Let me put your URL also in the
469
00:59:46.700 --> 00:59:48.120
Mark Entrekin: in the chat.
470
00:59:49.630 --> 00:59:51.060
Mark Entrekin: Do that right now
471
00:59:51.710 --> 00:59:58.729
Mark Entrekin: so many keys. There you go. I just put your URL in the chat also, so please everyone. Take advantage of this
472
00:59:58.860 --> 01:00:01.849
Mark Entrekin: rank has provided provided us with the Youtube
473
01:00:01.960 --> 01:00:05.960
Mark Entrekin: on the Disk information. He provided us with his free Pdf.
474
01:00:06.110 --> 01:00:09.590
Mark Entrekin: On productive conflict. And if you have any questions.
475
01:00:09.800 --> 01:00:17.410
Mark Entrekin: anything that Frank might be able to help you with his domain. His URL for his website is out there. Give him a call.
476
01:00:17.850 --> 01:00:24.890
Mark Entrekin: Frank again. It's good seeing you. We talk once in a while, but I just appreciate your time today and thank you so much for being here.
477
01:00:25.310 --> 01:00:28.350
Frank DeDominicis: Thank you for everything you're doing to bring unity
478
01:00:28.480 --> 01:00:32.520
Frank DeDominicis: to relationships, to families and to the world.
479
01:00:33.300 --> 01:00:38.020
Mark Entrekin: Thank you, Frank. I appreciate that. Everyone that's all for today. I hope to see you again next week
480
01:00:38.400 --> 01:00:45.759
Mark Entrekin: achieving unity success formula to us. We're part of that formula. Let's make it happen. Thank you. All cheers.
